tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-201062172024-03-07T05:54:57.805+00:00help I work with childrenThe honest journal of a children and family pastor "on a break" Somewhere in the UK.lynnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13386263352332136809noreply@blogger.comBlogger422125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20106217.post-41396563857951246402012-12-09T16:23:00.003+00:002012-12-09T22:20:42.975+00:00Caden's SongDear readers<br />
<br />
The Scottish news channel STV has recorded an interview with Caden Beggan's dad David and his close friends (and relatives) who are part of the band Union State.<br />
<br />
You can watch it <a href="http://bit.ly/VXkW7o">here</a><br />
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Please consider parting with 79p to buy this great recording (I'm loving it!) and know that you money is going to Yorkhill Children's Hospital in Glasgow into a special fund set up in Caden's memory to buy more of the kind of equipment that, amongst other things, filtrates blood following the onslaught of meningococcal septicaemia.<br />
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Bless you. Hoping to post about Akiane (as promised last post) soon, but wanted to pass the word on about the recording as soon as possible.<br />
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lynnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13386263352332136809noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20106217.post-17746103368988857002012-11-20T19:19:00.002+00:002012-11-20T23:08:31.637+00:00Precious Caden Beggan<i>Dear friends,<br />
<br />
Caden Riley Beggan<br />
Born 29th September, 2006<br />
Died 20th November, 2012<br />
. . . in Mummy and Daddy's arms.<br />
<br />
Thank you for all your support.<br />
<br />
Caden is alive forevermore . . .<br />
<br />
www.facebook.com/CadenBeggan</i> (posted by Caden's dad on his facebook page)<br />
<br />
<br />
I've written some reflections out in the hope they might offer some comfort.<br />
Precious Caden ..run and jump on the streets that are golden...explore the Heavenly City...laugh & giggle, play & dance, talk with the Jesus who knew you & loved you from before the creation of the world. Join in with the songs & shouts of praise to our God & know that in a very little while, we shall see you. Gone from this earth but alive for evermore ....<br />
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Caden <b>IS</b> alive for evermore. For the Christian, death is not the end. We do not deny that grief and pain exists but accompanying our mourning is our unshakeable, firm, belief that there <b>is</b> an afterlife and it is wonderful. And anyone is welcome to share this knowledge - it is not meant to be a well-guarded secret. We see descriptions of the fullness of life that lasts for eternity all through the Bible but perhaps most comforting of all for us who mourn today is what the book of Revelation says:<br />
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<i>Then I saw “a new heaven and a new earth," for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea. I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Look! God’s dwelling place is now among the people, and he will dwell with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. ‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death’ or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.”<br />
<br />
He who was seated on the throne said, “I am making everything new!” Then he said, “Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.”<blockquote></blockquote></i> [Revelation 21, verses 1 to 5]<br />
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"The old order of things has passed away" - everything that we see around us that kills, maims, destroys, divides families, spoils the earth, evokes greed, causes addiction, breaks down mental health and harms children <b>will no longer exist</b>. God created this earth (in whatever time span that makes you feel comfy!) and he intends to right everything that has gone wrong. And heaven, outside our time and space, reads like and sounds like it is the most amazing place ever. I'd strongly encourage any who are swithering about what this might mean to investigate further.<br />
<br />
May I recommend two top-selling paperbacks? The first has hardly been off the NY Times Bestseller list. You could find yourself reading one of these books in one sitting. They are stories of children who have seen what heaven is like:<br />
<a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/Heaven-Is-Real-Little-Astounding/dp/0849946158/ref=lh_ni_t">Heaven is For Real by Todd Burpo</a> and<br />
<a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Boy-Came-Back-Heaven/dp/1414336071/ref=pd_sim_b_2">The Boy Who Came Back From Heaven</a> by Kevin Malarkey<br />
<br />
You see, children are wired to connect with God very naturally. Scientists have actually discovered an area of the brain that does this. Check back next week (or sooner) and I'll write about a young artist called Akiane and her family's story. But in the meantime, check out the Bible and why not simply ask God: "are you for real? I want to know!"<br />
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In closing, though my heart is so heavy and I feel heartbroken for the Beggan family, together we all put our hope in God believing that we do not grieve as those who have no hope (1 Thessalonians 4 verse 13).<br />
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One day we will meet Caden again. Until that day.....<br />
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<iframe width="420" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/D7QZNBmgSMs" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe><br />
lynnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13386263352332136809noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20106217.post-17702905191713154132012-11-16T18:50:00.000+00:002012-11-20T23:08:16.884+00:00Caden Beggan - a little boy's fight for life<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDJOgL8j2_a1y3mWTfsDwYZVwGf6qS3DdoI8YPD0PoWxJ8PdlXv7X0uS_h-b1hagsXFZ9CFpqOnDT6W6nKGFeHQBYe8Gc34dRdwlzLWJ0m6c5FgZ0THmKg2gSR9h6nNtVPiwaKZA/s1600/374777_471323229557724_1936042886_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left:1em; margin-right:1em"><img border="0" height="400" width="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDJOgL8j2_a1y3mWTfsDwYZVwGf6qS3DdoI8YPD0PoWxJ8PdlXv7X0uS_h-b1hagsXFZ9CFpqOnDT6W6nKGFeHQBYe8Gc34dRdwlzLWJ0m6c5FgZ0THmKg2gSR9h6nNtVPiwaKZA/s400/374777_471323229557724_1936042886_n.jpg" /></a></div><br />
Dear readers.<br />
<br />
Today I want to ask if you would partner with me in praying for the life of 6 year old Caden Beggan. He lies in the ICU of the Royal Hospital for Sick Children in Glasgow, Scotland, following suffering from meningitis and septicaemia. Sadly, his legs and part of one of his arms have had to be amputated to save his life. He is still very, very sick. I'd love to urge you to read and share his story through his dad's eyes by reading the daily posts on <a href="http://www.facebook.com/cadenbeggan">www.facebook.com/cadenbeggan</a><br />
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I have never read such beautifully crafted, heart-rending and honest posts as these. But each and every one - even David's psalm of lament on Monday, points firmly to the Lord Almighty, the Lord of the Angel Armies, who sees and who knows.<br />
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I see a <i>uniting of goodness</i> awakening in this nation. An outpouring of compassion. A desire to speak well and bless, whether the person giving this voice has a strong personal faith or none. <b>I truly believe God is moving in ways we may not yet see, to bring glory to himself and to draw people to him - in the midst of an evil, inspid, hateful disease which reviles and pains the Lord to see. Yet in the outpouring of goodness and mercy we see the hand of the Creator as it is a reflection of<b> his</b> all-consuming goodness in the human beings he so lovingly created. We are his workmanship - all of us. </b><br />
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And today, a commercial bus company decorated their buses in pink livery, promoting Caden's continual "pinking" (for tissue life and vitality to be restored, for organs to be restored to their original condition). The buses also show the link to the facebook page cited above, where David and Angela's faith shines consistently and faithfully. The picture below shows one of Caden's favourites - a green dinosaur he drew himself and his parents' description of him: "to know him is to love him".<br />
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This is truly a <i>kairos</i> moment; where many, many people are reflecting on their own lives and families as well as on the Beggan family's battle. <b>Please, please pray for Caden. </b>I sense the battle is intense and continual. <br />
- Pray for Caden's parents David and Angela, his brothers Declan and Ethan, <br />
- for the doctors and nurses involved in his care - "Team Caden". <br />
- pray for the wounds from amputation to heal quickly and supernaturally well<br />
- pray for the continued improvement to Caden's heart rate<br />
- pray that his remaining arm and hand would be saved<br />
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Further detailed prayer information is posted daily on the <a href="http://www.facebook.com/cadenbeggan">Facebook page</a>.<br />
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With permission from the undermentioned people, these reflections point to a faithful God in the midst of deep anguish and pain. He remains our hope and our strength.<br />
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<b><br />
Quote from Mike A, (quoted with permission, 16/11/12)</b><br />
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<blockquote><i>His dad, David, continues to post daily on Caden's status (and his own). But I wanted to share some perspective with you from a close friend of the family, who is in regular contact locally with the family.<br />
<br />
Beth goes a long way to articulating my own heart, and how overwhelmed I have felt personally with the response from my own friends in church and on facebook. whether you pray or believe as I do; for those who have asked me privately about Caden; for those at work, family, church; through email or in person; for those who have taken up Caden's cause as your own; your compassion has moved me.</i><br />
</blockquote><br />
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<br />
<b><br />
Quote from Beth S, (quoted with permission, 16/11/12)</b><br />
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<blockquote><i>God does not give me everything I ask for and I do not understand His seeming lack of response in the face of thousands of prayers - but I have felt His presence tangibly close, even in the severest disappointments. He truly never leaves nor forsakes. <br />
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What seemed to me to be a perfect way to show Himself strong to a nation and the world, God seems to have passed up. I have learned that I am not the defender of His honour, nor the manipulator of how He should perform. His thoughts are far above my thoughts and His ways are not my ways. <br />
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God has given humans, when He created them in His image, a massive capacity for compassion for others. I have been kissed and hugged by a number of total strangers in shops and doctor's offices in the past few weeks, a point of contact with Caden for the one doing the hugging - a deep comfort for myself. The caring response to the Beggan family's suffering has been astounding.<br />
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'It takes a village......' - so many people see needs and work behind the scenes in this crisis, without being asked or even having others know they are helping. Some are literally 'laying down their lives for friends.' I am astounded at the generosity of people, doing what each can do in his own way, to help in a severe and ongoing crisis.<br />
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The dignity of Caden's parents and entire family, in the face of suffering through the deepest valley I have personally ever witnessed or been through, makes me know that their strength is not their own.<br />
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I know not how it can possibly happen, but I KNOW that in God's own omnipotent, omniscient and omnipresent attributes, in time He will weave (work) this together for good and be glorified.</i> </blockquote>lynnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13386263352332136809noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20106217.post-84528504004996758192012-11-12T21:40:00.002+00:002014-09-12T15:40:13.582+01:00Like the autumn rain, she's back!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgU8wJ2EuOO2nalRtwkbAn6hCWgbFjwbv2O3Rnwij_GG_i34wwBtX9bf3TjLOJ9r0V2dCcxguxipLbsiJaNHFMDFCydqfpXZesh6IJo0jBchC6ooLSk7zqduJ01CnEawaYKtu7izw/s1600/presseddownrunningover.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left:1em; margin-right:1em"><img border="0" height="213" width="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgU8wJ2EuOO2nalRtwkbAn6hCWgbFjwbv2O3Rnwij_GG_i34wwBtX9bf3TjLOJ9r0V2dCcxguxipLbsiJaNHFMDFCydqfpXZesh6IJo0jBchC6ooLSk7zqduJ01CnEawaYKtu7izw/s320/presseddownrunningover.jpg" /></a></div><br />
It's been such a long time I dont know if anyone is reading what I write anymore. Which suits me just fine! I see the wee eBuzzing logo has gone into hibernation, probably because I haven't blogged for a while. I had a <a href="http://www.lynnalexander.org.uk">professional website </a>set up to deal with the launch of my book so my attention has been focused there a little bit - but that's not the place for the incessant chatter of my daily life.<br />
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I can't do the whole update here on what I've been up to and where I'm at right now - I'll just let it come out bit by bit and I'll try and write a few more updates.<br />
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Basically my book is selling really well and I have been truly, honestly honoured by how it has been received. One of the most wonderful things that has happened for me is my connection - nay, <b>grafting in</b> - to the folks at <a href="http://www.3dmuk.co.uk">3DMUK</a> - <b>the most humble, honest, life-affirming and encouraging people I have ever met.</b> For those of us in churches which wish to turn out the way a little more to serve those outside of the current congregation whilst seeing the members grown and develop at the same time, the guys at 3DMUK don't force anything upon you nor tell you what to do; they merely offer advice, ideas, coaching, vision, direction, experience and ...humility, coupled with a reliance and demonstration of the Spirit's power.<br />
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So wherever you are at right now, I can say hand on heart, God is faithful - but watch your heart and your mouth and stay close to His word and to others who love him, love you and keep you accountable!<br />
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<i>Luke 6:38<br />
New International Version (NIV)<br />
Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.<blockquote></blockquote></i>lynnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13386263352332136809noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20106217.post-40525238847467034302012-07-23T12:16:00.000+01:002012-07-23T12:16:00.334+01:00Book Update<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMWwlscgqb7WsLbIcuOl6Q0d-rqEHFhsC0D8JyYPMsNppavMNnCr6GsdHA5rvWPWeSuvexEWfC0oUzSjRK_0gRwtnUQ9KdO1QFsq-BCPzSD9chBriw7Q3WNopkhpT78OICdNjHdw/s1600/Alexander_FrontCover.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear:left; float:left;margin-right:1em; margin-bottom:1em"><img border="0" height="400" width="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMWwlscgqb7WsLbIcuOl6Q0d-rqEHFhsC0D8JyYPMsNppavMNnCr6GsdHA5rvWPWeSuvexEWfC0oUzSjRK_0gRwtnUQ9KdO1QFsq-BCPzSD9chBriw7Q3WNopkhpT78OICdNjHdw/s400/Alexander_FrontCover.jpg" /></a></div><br />
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<b>Children, Families and God: Drawing the Generations Together</b><br />
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And in other news, my book is selling well but could, of course, do with more selling (I'd make a rubbish salesperson!) to help me pay off the rather large debt I incurred in this project. If I'm being honest I'm a bit concerned about this, I sometimes worry at night about finance, but this whole year has been about me being on a journey of faith and trust and no longer feeling safe in ministry. In that case, 100% success has been achieved there and I couldn't ask for more ;-) <br />
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However, I would like to be employed again in some capacity. I'm trying to work out if its sinful to ask for this....! Probably is. I'm just awful at waiting quietly.<br />
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Copies of the book are available direct from me right to your door on <a href="http://www.lynnalexander.org.uk">www.lynnalexander.org.uk</a> - only one click needed to buy (you're doing better now, Lynn!) and it will be posted straight to your door.<br />
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A distribution company in the UK (the truly wonderful <a href="https://www.joiningthedotsdistribution.co.uk/">Joining the Dots UK</a>) has brought the remainder of the books into the UK for onward transmission to bookshops etc and lots and lots are being taken to the three New Wine weeks I think, as at least two one speakers have recommended the book. I am praying that they will do well there because, of course, bringing them in to an event is no guarantee that they would sell. I have a book launch and signing at <a href="http://www.clangathering.org.uk">CLAN</a> (New Wine Scotland) next <b>Wednesday 1st August at the morning break in the bookshop </b> - please do come along if you are there - all support of every kind hugely welcomed!<br />
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The Diocese of London, Scottish Christian Broadcast magazine and the Baptist Union of Great Britain have reviewed the book very favourably, with more reviews on the way. Some churches have bought multiple copies for their leadership teams to read with regard to the mission and discipleship of the great big family of God together. My friends at <a href="http://www.3DMuk.com">3DMUK</a> have been selling the books to pastors and church leaders from the UK and European countries - I watched in awe as Dutch pastors took ten copies when I attended <a href="http://www.pilgrimageuk.org">Pilgrimage</a> in Sheffield! <br />
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I never imagined this kind of thing in my wildest dreams when I wrote the book. I remain in awe of the way God communicated his heart to me for the book in the midst of my own pain and sadness with regard to the frustrating situation I found myself in at that time. He put people around me who <b>saw</b> and <b>listened</b> and spoke the words of life over this project. They were operating at another level, really, with eyes of faith that saw something God would bring to completion. All glory and thanks to God - he clearly had his agenda in the book project as I simply would not have been able to write it had it not been for all that happened.<br />
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The really exciting news (for me) is that Children, Families and God: Drawing the Generations Together has been released in ebook format and is available in 6 countries - see the relevant amazon kind lore stores for further details - UK, USA, Spain, Germany, Italy and France.<br />
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If you have read the book and liked it, please let others know - buy one for your church leader(s), your parents, your youth workers, your neighbours - I did try to design it as a bible study guide, as a resource to underline and use for training others, as a tool for personal reflection and personal prayer and for activating and and encouraging others for what is ahead. I pray you will be blessed and be a blessing.<br />
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Oh - and if you want to pop a review on www.amazon.com in the USA especially - or on www.amazon.co.uk or www.eden.co.uk or anything else - that would be great!<br />
<br />
www.lynnalexander.org.uk<br />
www.facebook.com/childrenfamiliesandgodbook<br />
<br />lynnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13386263352332136809noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20106217.post-42520076144506629952012-07-23T00:34:00.001+01:002012-07-23T11:41:12.081+01:00The Influence of Parents<br />
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I just read the following (see quote) on a <a href="http://www.worshipcentral.org/forum/topic/who-is-your-favourite-preacher-speaker-and-why">Worship Central forum</a>. The thread asked people what Bible speakers or teachers had influenced them the most.<br />
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One person wrote boldly and publicly -<br />
<i>My Dad. He's The Real Deal. He Is Radical About Jesus, Like Jesus Is Radical For Us! He Doesn't Water Down The Word. He's My Biggest Role Model. My Dad Didn't Commit His Heart To Jesus Til He Was 31yrs Old. (I Was 12yrs) He Was Raised In A Broken Home In The Slums Of Philadelphia, And All He Knew Was To Fight His Way Through Life. (Literally) I Grew Up Watching My Dad In Rock Bands And Semi-Pro Boxing. While My Father Hid His Vices From Me And My Sisters, I Knew He Was Broken Inside. I Saw The Hand Of God Captivate The Life Of My Dad. God Reveals To Me His Power And Love Everyday Through The Life Of This Man. He Became A Home Missions Pastor By The Age Of 37 & The Lord Has Used Him To Turn Our Community Upside Down. He's A Combat Commando!!! My Dad Has Taught Me To Always Remain Faithful To God No Matter What The Cost, And He Leads By Example.<blockquote></blockquote></i><br />
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Those of us who are parents, how deep and wonderful our love is in influencing - nay - SHAPING and MOULDING the next generation. And where we're struggling - don't parent alone. Get alongside others in your community who will help you reflect the glory and grace of God which can change your life - make you more patient where you feel tetchiness and graceless, fill your heart with love for your child where you feel dry, refresh you in the challenge of parenting. He really does do this - if only you knew how much I need this and receive this whenever I come to the fount of living water to ask for help. I'm living and loving Hebrews 4: <i>Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.</i><br />
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Resist the urge to send your children away to activities or camps every week during long holidays - invest your time in them and you will reap the dividends. Tell your children you cherish them - explain what the word means (if they are younger) and lavish its use on them - it makes them feel so secure and loved. <br />
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Precious, dearly loved children. How they need to know this. And so do we.<br />
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<b>See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!<i></i></b> (I John 3:1)lynnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13386263352332136809noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20106217.post-985474967171618942012-06-08T00:31:00.002+01:002014-09-11T21:38:26.700+01:00Face into the Sunflower<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTxWPfL_1rZ38vd_AzFHhJ_aZRJqIzPwF8JMzQF7LMED3fX8Bbw4IMMhKsc2kwp9MN5A0B9BItSmDV3VFOQNEqfXlX01t5l05M2jcs6pTyoHtWUgMvRxBN3l9Za_FLl4xT1XBpSw/s1600/childSunflower-300x217.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left:1em; margin-right:1em"><img border="0" height="217" width="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTxWPfL_1rZ38vd_AzFHhJ_aZRJqIzPwF8JMzQF7LMED3fX8Bbw4IMMhKsc2kwp9MN5A0B9BItSmDV3VFOQNEqfXlX01t5l05M2jcs6pTyoHtWUgMvRxBN3l9Za_FLl4xT1XBpSw/s400/childSunflower-300x217.jpg" /></a><br />
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Life just got really, really exciting. Word is beginning to get out about the book and the first book launch is one week tomorrow. A couple of national reviews have been done and the physical books - my share of them - arrived today.<br />
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I think what I am most excited about is that "it is finished". I have been obedient to what I believe God asked me to do. Read back <a href="http://helpiworkwithchildren.blogspot.co.uk/2011/04/next.html">here</a>, wow, I can hardly believe it myself!<br />
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I have just realised that I have not written anywhere on this personal blog what happened at the <a href="http://leadershipconference.htb.org.uk/">HTB Leadership conference</a> in February 2011 that was really a catalyst for all that you may have been tracking. At the end of one of the session (and to be honest, coffee was being served, there was no remarkable encounter/ministry time happening for me), a chap I knew vaguely but who I had never, ever had a conversation with came up to me and asked, out of the blue: <b>"what's God saying to you just now?"<i></i></b><br />
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I was taken aback, its true I hadn't left the front where worship and prayer had been happening, but I was just standing quietly, alone. I said: "<i><b>God is saying to me once again that I will write a book to prepare the UK for the coming influx of children and their families and I will write this to help church leaders know how to handle this from a number of different angles. The book will take many different topics but will ground it in practical theology and real life stories</b> </i>" (or something like this). <br />
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I didn't expect him to be that interested, to be honest, but he stood back and said: <b>"the time is now. You need to write this now"<i></i></b>. I explained that I had a demanding job on staff at the large church I was part of and came home exhausted, just wanting to be with my children and husband and I couldn't see how I could fit this in until the children were bigger.<br />
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He paused for a moment and said: "<i><b>you need to ask for a sabbatical.</b></i>" At this point I burst into tears as I had been feeling the same and had asked my employers who had not responded favourably to my request for a number of reasons - so that door was shut. I had been a children and family pastor for 8 years; I had worked hard, I loved those I served deeply and I knew hand on heart that I was not asking for selfish reasons.<br />
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We exchanged a little more on this and then he prayed for me. I can only explain what felt like lightening strike me - and him - and - I don't know how you will take this readers, but all I can say that what happened in the natural PHYSICALLY felt like a decisive 'strike' to act. I had no idea how I could afford to do what I was going to end up doing a few weeks later and the mechanics of what happened next I will leave there. Suffice to say, the friends with prophetic ministry confirmed the compulsion I felt to do this thing. And as you read back you will see how much pain was in the birth of this book, but it meant my face was pressed hard against the throne of God; all I could do was look at him and bring all that I felt, all that I wanted, all that I had risked and given up, at his feet. Hence the sunflower picture at the top of this post - face into the beauty! <br />
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<b>Getting the Book</b><br />
If you live in the States you will be able to order Children, Families and God: Drawing the Generations Together to Change the World <a href="http://www.destinyimage.com">here</a><br />
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If you live in the UK, order using my personal website below in the first instance, and/or ask your local Christian bookstore to stock the book (this would help get other people to buy it?) - you may need to let them know the publisher is Evangelista Media, formerly Destiny Image Europe, and it has just been published (June 2012)<br />
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If you happen to be reading this and are attending <a href="http://www.pilgrimageuk.org">PilgrimageUK</a> in Sheffield, 11th to 14th June, you can also buy it there!<br />
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If you would like a copy to review for a national publication, contact me via the website.<br />
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Orders/contacts/endorsements/diary - all do-able now through <a href="http://www.lynnalexander.org.uk">this website</a>.<br />
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Thank you for standing with me.<br />
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lynnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13386263352332136809noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20106217.post-69241384160249160402012-05-03T15:52:00.001+01:002012-05-03T15:52:56.014+01:00Book Launch Details<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYJ_jtlqOq5i6Au0vuAMrkayyOnFdq2HxIupVttLo0LLRYcSTkBgJpKaR0FoHk-ZiGs-6uuEplgzQjDY2yoYsYFFMTpN7TlhU-xPakgXTxfWvRT5OOFSvhNQ-w9Lnjtf04uomNzA/s1600/Alexander_FullCover-1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left:1em; margin-right:1em"><img border="0" height="288" width="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYJ_jtlqOq5i6Au0vuAMrkayyOnFdq2HxIupVttLo0LLRYcSTkBgJpKaR0FoHk-ZiGs-6uuEplgzQjDY2yoYsYFFMTpN7TlhU-xPakgXTxfWvRT5OOFSvhNQ-w9Lnjtf04uomNzA/s400/Alexander_FullCover-1.jpg" /></a></div><br />
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On June 9th the first delivery of this book will with me!<br />
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If you would like to pre-order, please send your email address to children.pastor@gmail.com and I will send you a pre-order form. <br />
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The publisher is Evangelista Media (formerly Destiny Image Europe) and so the book will be available to Christian booksellers through the normal distribution networks. The book will also be available in the United States and worldwide through the publisher's website.<br />
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Below are the details of the two Scottish book launches. If you live anywhere near, or can travel to come, <b>please do come to celebrate with me</b> the culmination of this part of the journey. For me these evenings will be a time to celebrate - I managed to finish a book and more than that, the HUGE risk I took has paid off in that those who have pre-read the book say they have found it encouraging, inspiring to them personally and timely. I'm so glad. All I wanted to do was to produce something that was helpful and gave something back from all that I have experienced in my walk with God thus far. But it wasn't borne easily and as many of you know, I experienced pain in its birth - in many ways I felt very alone.<br />
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I left my job to read and ponder children, families, faith, discipling and missional communities and the future of the church! So on these evenings we will worship and pray together for the future of the church in the UK. These evenings are not about buying a book (honest!)<br />
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Friday 15 June 2012</b> @ Holy Trinity Church, Hailesland Place, Wester Hailes, Edinburgh EH14 - <b>7.45pm</b><br />
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<b>T</b><b>uesday 19 June 2012</b> @ Queens Park Baptist Church, (Camphill Building) Balvicar Street, Glasgow G42 <b> - 7.45pm</b><br />
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Below is one of the endorsements at the front of the book. Hopefully it gives you a flavour of what its about.<br />
<blockquote><i>Page after page of this excellent book is filled with the testimonies of children, young people and families who have been completely transformed by the love and power of God. These stories are woven together to produce a passionate and articulate advocacy for the church to move in a new way. Lynn is calling on the church to embrace whole family discipleship and so much more. This is a radical departure from a great deal of what is currently happening in children's, youth and family work within the church.<br />
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I believe that this is a prophetic book - there is something here that is a foretelling of what the Lord wants to do in our nation. Lynn boldly lays out a way of thinking and being the church that will enable every generation to find their place within the church's new awakening. I strongly recommend the reader to take time to read, ponder and weigh what is being said here. There is a way ahead within these pages.</i><br />
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Alan McWilliam, Church Leader, Whiteinch Church of Scotland and Chairman, CLAN (New Wine Scotland)</b><br />
</blockquote><br />lynnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13386263352332136809noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20106217.post-60040318796419517282012-04-19T22:54:00.004+01:002012-04-19T22:55:57.444+01:00I'm so excited and I just can't hide it<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyrVx2ZYrjxpI2oD63vXcrHB_EfeuUHczpLnJDgnp1mpKc58aAinPIuVXiwTykFAxH1gD-aM24k-iHR53uAPVO_XiEF2r_3XQzyI8j9ZYjg2KABn3l3I6uiIl2xgcjbaTdbdkBuA/s1600/book.png"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 250px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyrVx2ZYrjxpI2oD63vXcrHB_EfeuUHczpLnJDgnp1mpKc58aAinPIuVXiwTykFAxH1gD-aM24k-iHR53uAPVO_XiEF2r_3XQzyI8j9ZYjg2KABn3l3I6uiIl2xgcjbaTdbdkBuA/s400/book.png" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5733233799026961762" /></a>lynnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13386263352332136809noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20106217.post-21681752470631272372012-02-29T16:31:00.004+00:002012-02-29T16:41:22.385+00:00It takes a whole church......<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiL2FyfITCnhgZUfwLUu9aDg6omgO_iLn8heaKsVNYja5z_bZgbvqefUGGSN94KALpCY7GAKMnQTJSR3c5o91qsu9_29be3BhXRnvcc1VhrkVFeF3CMWUbMcLlr0216ojCddlaYew/s1600/DSCN4408+4+generations+hands.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiL2FyfITCnhgZUfwLUu9aDg6omgO_iLn8heaKsVNYja5z_bZgbvqefUGGSN94KALpCY7GAKMnQTJSR3c5o91qsu9_29be3BhXRnvcc1VhrkVFeF3CMWUbMcLlr0216ojCddlaYew/s400/DSCN4408+4+generations+hands.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5714598601349725074" /></a><br />Below is an open comment I wrote on Krish Kandiah's blog <a href="http://krishk.com/2012/02/takes-church/">in response to a post he wrote.</a> Read all the responses others have made. Great points raised from other people's experiences. What are your thoughts?<br /><br /><br />Hi all<br /><br />I am probably too late to add a comment in but I had a special reason for waiting…..this post really wound me up Krish. Not in a bad way, as I hope I will explain but because it made me weep tears of pain and frustration. I have taught, practised, written, trained, preached and prayed on and through what I am about to say. I'm not posting it to wind people up or being deliberately (naughtily) provocative back, I’m just sticking my head above the parapet to share a little of my heart for our church.<br />I didn’t choose to do what I do now, I would have been very happy (and better off!) in my previous career and like the commenter who has been asked when he’s going to become a real pastor, not a youth pastor, I have felt the pull of God to do what I do because of the reformation I believe he wants to bring to the Church.<br /><br />What we have always done just isn’t working. In the year 2000 the church-going population of Great Britain was 4.4 million and 19% of this figure were children aged 15 or under, i.e. 836,000 children. By 2025 the churchgoing population is estimated to be 2.3 million with 5% aged 15 or under i.e. 115,000 . That’s a huge decrease in 15 years or so, if current projections continue. We will have lost 721,000 children in a 25 year period that we are almost halfway through.<br />If we were to go back to 1990’s figures and compare this with the 2025 estimate, we will have lost contact with 1.1 million children .<br /><br />Now Peter Brierley (from whom I have these stats) and Mark Griffiths ("One Generation From Extinction") have written extensively on this. I don't want to remain at the point of doom and gloom. I write now as from my experience as a children and family pastor.<br /><br />I found your post provocative Krish because unless the way we do church is up for root and branch reformation, we simply talk. We know how bad the statistics are and we know we have to do something. I don’t believe we have to have the attitude of getting our kids to last through church but instead, have more of an attitude that is up for a return to the Old and New Testament pattern of (as Gordon Wenham says) – “we’re part of a team”. We’re in this together and we don’t live for our own preferences or style of church; how can we together learn more about our amazing God and let as many people as possible know about because of the way we live our lives as individuals, families and communities?<br /><br />I’ve been able to think recently, (and huge thanks to Joel Green’s writing on children and families in the book of Acts) at what it must have looked like to see such radical reformation of household life in the First Century. For women and children in particular something so utterly revolutionary was happening to their treatment and status that those outside Christianity looked and wanted to be part; in a context of hardship and even waves of persecution, people wanted to see the same kind of radical reorientation and transformation in their family lives. Pliny wrote that even children were at risk from the menace of Christianity! Chuckle. This thing was spreading like wildfire through the Roman Empire and men, women and children were loving Jesus and each other as part of the embryonic church.<br /><br />You see, straight away what I represent is more than just children, although I love them dearly, I love the church. I love what we look like when we are together. I love that on a Sunday morning I look out a gathering like no other on the face of the earth. No shopping mall, football stadium, concert or school composes such a rich mix of ages, backgrounds, interests and ethnicities.<br />Partitioning and compartmentalising for convenience sake only has really got to stop in all of our major denominations in order that we might operate as I believe an extended family (the clan and tribe of the people of God).<br /><br />Now I do not write this post as an intergenerational guru.Yes, I have set up and advocated intergenerational small groups. I’ve also done age-specific groups. I teach or oversee in all-age settings, but also separate settings. I am not saying that we must be together ALL of the time What I am saying is that we have deferred to be apart MOST of the time. I could write or propose a structure for an individual church as I have been able to put into practice in my own ministry but you know what, that’s not going to kick it either.<br /><br />What I have found to be most effective is not a structure or de-programming exercise but a massive culture shift in how we see the young: their current potential, their innate ability to have proven insight into things of the kingdom, their natural connection with the supernatural, their place of incredible acceptance and humility. THESE THINGS we are to nurture, provide space for and…..learn from…..<br /><br />Negativity and decline is NOT the picture across the whole world. There are lessons to learn from churches in nations (Indonesia is a great example) who are experiencing tremendous growth due to what I would summarise as this: children contribute to and partake in kingdom practices – they are being discipled as naturally as drawing breath through the input of the whole church which means they learn to pray with expectant faith, worship chasing the presence of God and engage naturally in mission which is marked by signs and wonders.<br /><br />I just feel its time for us to take our hands off controlling church shape and structure a little more which, at times, favours the oldest/wealthiest/gobbiest/(insert your own adjective!!). Children occupy a unique place in the gospels, one which with all my heart I long for the church in the UK to return to.<br /><br />Jesus, children and the kingdom, all three are in relationship. Through their lack of desire for power and prestige or glory they possess something that I believe we are desperate for in the UK – a church with integrity, authenticity and humility marked with God’s heart to love freely and with a demonstration of the Spirit’s power.<br /><br />Bless you Krish for taking the time to stir this up – you have been much on my mind since you wrote this.lynnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13386263352332136809noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20106217.post-54718113253450142162012-01-30T20:44:00.007+00:002012-01-31T01:57:25.161+00:00Something's stirring<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGFHw9E1tDfJv4ZgJdoWtIzHEW1nuXjxAEYLWXBhmCih0BAl_YGOW2rxpk2lh8x1-LGoQyGRGV2-Z8P3qTyQ4tAjZtth675FK-ZhcEQV1TReN5VXp5zt8V5vESWCYXfxefwSm6Cw/s1600/Stressed-Mom.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 212px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGFHw9E1tDfJv4ZgJdoWtIzHEW1nuXjxAEYLWXBhmCih0BAl_YGOW2rxpk2lh8x1-LGoQyGRGV2-Z8P3qTyQ4tAjZtth675FK-ZhcEQV1TReN5VXp5zt8V5vESWCYXfxefwSm6Cw/s320/Stressed-Mom.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5703609337822239938" /></a><br />Imagine what it would look like if children, teenagers and their parents with no faith background at all, who know nothing of the stories of Jesus, start to come along to your gatherings in significant numbers – as little as three or four families could change the dynamic of some smaller churches and some fifty families will have a considerable impact.<br /> <br />It was with a mixture of excitement and incredulity <a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2012/jan/15/mariella-frostrup-mother-frustrated-church">that I read the following question</a> from a working mother in a column in one of the UK’s quality newspapers. She was seeking advice from the well known TV presenter Mariella Frostrup :<br /><br /><em><blockquote>I feel angry a lot at the moment – I'm taking it out on my husband, and because my two-year-old is inseparable from him I'm worried I'm also hurting him when I head for the front door. I'm so frustrated. I'm the main breadwinner and I work 60 hours a week while my husband and mother-in-law look after our children. It's the best-case scenario, but it drives me mad. My husband constantly whines about how tired he is from his 27-hour working week. When I'm at home I'm in primary care of the children. I would find the sick feminist joke that is my life funny and enjoyable if I was appreciated, but I'm not remotely. I have my character assassinated on a daily basis. Do you think church is the answer? I don't believe in God, but all that singing and being grateful has to help, surely?</blockquote></em>I read this woman’s desperate question just days before I finished an edit of my book on getting ready for children and families to seek out solace and meaning in the church - community - and I felt a deep urge to include a reference to this story in the book, so I hope I have snuck it in despite the deadline.<br /><br />This precious family is who we are to be ready for – <strong>will you love them with me? </strong><br /><br />There were a variety of comments in the online section of the newspaper following Ms Frostrup’s reply, with one person suggesting that the advice given back (“why not check out church?”) was written sarcastically. I know that the actual scenario was true, as I personally have met women who have expressed the identical sentiment to this. <em>Something </em>is drawing them. Let’s be ready to welcome whole families coming to or churches to check us out, to come to a church gathering so that they do something together and experience something different from consumer-led weekends - there is a growing desire for community and I'm up for whatever this entails!<br /><br />Full source reference:Life & Style column, Observer magazine, p54, Sunday 15 January 2012, online link in second paragraphlynnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13386263352332136809noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20106217.post-5357244386527970832012-01-11T22:23:00.003+00:002012-01-11T22:49:57.722+00:00Book Update<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZ3dhLhUNaumlYMsOoIvmJ8ye6aA6TpPsjPGWwqToX7Hthn7AzEv1jnftYu3SPHpTEqQwPFZWgF_IygtIH-fC4biOwo3Db7_r6Z6f3DMNsaZFdYPfW9tNG6mZbzAvkPtHISsNh3g/s1600/editing.png"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 299px; height: 255px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZ3dhLhUNaumlYMsOoIvmJ8ye6aA6TpPsjPGWwqToX7Hthn7AzEv1jnftYu3SPHpTEqQwPFZWgF_IygtIH-fC4biOwo3Db7_r6Z6f3DMNsaZFdYPfW9tNG6mZbzAvkPtHISsNh3g/s320/editing.png" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5696504329802877730" /></a><br /><br /><br />Quick update on where the book writing project is. <em><strong>It's finished!</strong></em><br /><br />It's now in the <em>internal editing process </em>which is me and my three senior pastor friends who have agreed to have a read and suggest changes, but at the same time the manuscript is now with my publisher and next week the <em>external, professional edit</em> begins.<br /><br />The publisher has also asked me to obtain some 250 word summaries for the first page or back cover of book. The person who knows me best, my senior pastor of 27 years, said it contains "dynamite". That's a bit scarey (it could go down like a lead balloon?) and also very honouring of him to say that as he is man with a deep knowledge of Scripture with impeccably high standards (there is no truth at all in the rumours that he used to re-align all the chairs early on a Sunday morning if they were millimetres out from their set pattern.....!!!?)<br /><br />Next comes the cover design, title etc.... - very, very exciting. It's been a long haul but I have read a lot, prayed more and really "enquired of the Lord" to process my ideas and thoughts. It has also been an act of worship and a time to recall all the great things the Lord has done amongst the congregation in the two churches I have worked in. <br /><br />If you are interested in getting a copy, I hope it will be out by June this yearlynnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13386263352332136809noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20106217.post-44914745916512664062012-01-04T22:31:00.008+00:002012-01-04T23:16:33.762+00:00God loves children<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBi_M6TXFeBAO5lU6RekmCgFQNFO97NBgGIqDI1nMkzFj68Usf2_G-qDKkO9pwW6toHbeWt3InYFfgp50rBnHuwVLHCF5kIbB4TrurhLDrADwEiTcVFDUiIKE0w0oAD_a9Kn5usw/s1600/children+expression.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 238px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBi_M6TXFeBAO5lU6RekmCgFQNFO97NBgGIqDI1nMkzFj68Usf2_G-qDKkO9pwW6toHbeWt3InYFfgp50rBnHuwVLHCF5kIbB4TrurhLDrADwEiTcVFDUiIKE0w0oAD_a9Kn5usw/s320/children+expression.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5693911951789765474" /></a><br />I've written this post for anyone who pops by here because of what I posted on a public forum offering to pray for anyone who wanted someone to do that for them following the "One Born Every Minute" programme on TV tonight.<br /><br />God loves children, very much. He cares about their entrance into this world, that moment of birth, the first breath they take and the path they follow in life. <br /><br />He didn't intend that it should be a difficult time, a lonely time or a tragic time. This world has got pretty messed up through the actions of humans and not because God wanted it to happen or meant it to happen.<br /><br />But he knows when we need him, and the great news is that when we look for him or call out to him, he's there.<br /><br />I'm a minister, a pastor, who specialises in working with and supporting parents, children and families. Although I'm on a break from my job just now because I am finishing a writing project, I love what I do. It's not about forcing what I believe on anyone, I always, always respect other people's beliefs - my job has always been more about standing alongside you when things are tough or celebrating with you when your family brings you joy and happiness. Being a parent and working together as a family is genuinely hard work at times!<br /><br />Christians believe that prayer works. God always listens when we pray, so post in the comments below if you would like me, and some of my friends who I trust hugely, to pray for your family and your children. You can keep it anonymous and not even give much details except please pray for XX and XX.<br /><br />I used to work alongside a carers and toddler group that met twice a week and the carers got a break while their children were looked after by "aunties", older people from our church who were fully trained and Disclosure-checked. We had a prayer tin where people could write out things they or the family were worried about and some of us met to pray for these little requests. Every week there was things in that tin and it was a great privilege to be trusted with them so that we could pray.<br /><br />If I can answer any questions you have about Christianity and what Christians believe and especially how this fits in with children, do post here too or perhaps you might think about attending an Alpha course, again all of the details on these (you put your postcode in and you can find out where one is near you) by <a href="http://www.alpha.org">clicking here</a><br /><br />Alpha is great, it's a no-pressure course introducing Christianity, often over a meal if its an evening course, or at the very least (if its during the day) with coffee and cake! You can ask anything at all, be totally honest about what you think and no-one will try to make you change your mind. The course just puts some information before you (usually by watching a short DVD) and then has a discussion time. What I have always found to be great about alpha is that people make really good friends and the group forms a strong bond - which is an added bonus!<br /><br />Finally, here's an ancient prayer of blessing that any of us can pray over our babies and children, friends or older relatives. I often pray it while the other person sleeps. You're praying it to the God who suggested it<br />to us as a way of blessing each other and it is now used by many churches as a prayer said over babies and children. A blessing is simply praying the best from God for someone.<br /><br />Its from the book of Numbers, chapter 6, in the Bible. An online bible is available <a href="http://www.biblegateway.com">here</a>.<br /> <br />The LORD bless you <br /> and keep you; <br />the LORD make his face shine on you <br /> and be gracious to you; <br />the LORD turn his face toward you <br /> and give you peace.”’lynnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13386263352332136809noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20106217.post-85718354036852266272012-01-03T01:08:00.005+00:002012-01-03T01:36:32.969+00:00Dummies Guide to Creating a Vision Statement<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEidYMkWMtxDJUWE4mjpQbx7gUh7tP4XHAGCiE63ExTad15siglLaAp23DR4W__n3G0cbjt9XkTtja4wrBhi7ZIP-ESttdBkIMUdI0b7cikB6cSdvXODWXzGmwthXg6eis7ALYyRCQ/s1600/dummiesguide.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 261px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEidYMkWMtxDJUWE4mjpQbx7gUh7tP4XHAGCiE63ExTad15siglLaAp23DR4W__n3G0cbjt9XkTtja4wrBhi7ZIP-ESttdBkIMUdI0b7cikB6cSdvXODWXzGmwthXg6eis7ALYyRCQ/s400/dummiesguide.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5693212546510261586" /></a><br />In this period of sabbaticalling I have met with a number of lead pastors who are working out their church's view on children and children's ministry. They have all asked me how I got my vision going.<br /><br />Prior to April, I was emailed by LOADS of children's/youth workers all over the country to ask, amongst other things, how I knew what I was to do first, what were my priorities. I always asked them what their vision for their role was - which was often met with....pauses/blank looks/uncertainty. So I'm pretty pleased that now their team leaders want to support them in this.<br /><br />Last year I ran an equipping track at my annual vision day to help pastors and leaders get a vision for children's and youth ministry but, errrrr, I encouraged them gently <strong>not to </strong>just copy my vision statement. That's a cop out - what might the Spirit of God want to say to you which will be much more exciting than my vision statement would say?! I know whose I would rather have any day :-)<br /><br />Here's my <strong>Dummies Guide to Creating a Vision Statement</strong><br />(not that I am saying pastors are dummies. Far from it. I'm one!! (one what?)<br /><br /><br /><br /><em><strong>Implementing a Vision for Children and Young People </strong></em><br /><br />The first THREE steps to implementing a vision for children and young people in YOUR church are to:<br /><br /><strong>1.Get armed with information from culture and Christian research<br /><br />2.Get familiar with passages in the Bible pertaining to children and young people<br /><br />3.Have an open heart and mind, to be challenged and changed, stirred and broken</strong>.<br /><br /><br />The next step, if it is needed…..(and it might not be, you alone know this about your church).<strong> Vision for the future is built from the ashes of repentance.</strong><br /><br /><strong>4.Repent for any wrong attitudes personally or corporately held towards children and young people.</strong><br />See <a href="http://helpiworkwithchildren.blogspot.com/2009/10/unlearning-unhelpful.html">this post for help </a>with this.<br /><br /><strong>5. Consider the following definitions. Make sure you understand them:</strong> <br />Values – principles held that informed the vision process<br />Vision – the place children’s, family and all age ministry should go. <br />Process – how is this vision to become reality?<br /><br /><strong>6. The next step is to write out your theological non-negotiables about children and young people. These are your values.</strong><br /><br /> "My last church" example:<br /><em>•Children start with God. However, their “default” is to veer away from him without a twin strategy of evangelism and nurture. Every young person needs to hear the Good News and be nurtured in their faith journey</em>.<br /><br />•<em>Children and teenagers need to be given regular opportunities to personally respond to what God has done through Jesus’ death and resurrection and to keep on saying “yes” to Jesus through thick and thin, throughout their stages of cognitive and spiritual development.</em> <br /><br />•<em>Children and young people are capable of understanding their position in Christ, precious, chosen, people whose prayers are heard and who are worthy of the Father’s love, “welcome at the table”. </em><br /><br />•<em>Children and young people are part of the Joel 2:28 promise (“I will pour out my Spirit on all flesh”). We are not to construct a theology of “what is not for them”. We uphold that there is no “junior” Holy Spirit.</em><br /><br /><strong>7. Then write out what, in your wildest dreams, you would like to see in the future. This is your vision. </strong><br /><br />Mine is tightly worded into three bullet points. If your church has a vision statement, look at your thoughts to see if it marries with it. Hopefully it’s not going in the opposite direction!<br /><br />Obviously I am not going to reproduce this here now as that was for then. I will be asking God what it should be for next place I am and those who follow me in my previous church should be asking God what it is they are uniquely to bring as they're not me and they will have different "wildest dreams". I know mine were very big but I had a history of seeing big things happen with God so I was never going to have a vision statement that said <em>"I hope the children all behave and have good fun in Sunday School."</em> <br /><br /><strong>8. Think: how are you going to get there? What needs to change? This is the process.</strong><br /><br />Again, I had a tightly worded pathway to make these things happen and before the church's structure changed I was a significant way along seeing these being carried out.<br /><br /><strong>9. Finally, writing a vision requires the heart to follow it through to implementation.</strong> <br />It needs to be presented to vestry/diaconates/board/elders. It needs to be taught from the front. <strong>It needs to underpin every leadership decision your church makes. </strong> It needs to have someone/people behind it who can make it happen. Who are passionate about prayer and passionate about the vision; which is why the initial four steps are more important than anything else.lynnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13386263352332136809noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20106217.post-585435534811892472011-12-22T18:10:00.008+00:002011-12-22T21:58:38.477+00:00Taking it up a gear: children and prayer<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibmlXs0tz5RebElpZCOu9xh071kMcH-cxuYXZx1gXTHKrJ5YeTVQuL71i5VkN8ps4sNrI5JAMKV3HBUlBU6Ny4AF2HCz3mIFrwpl02iRFBppQWA2P21yR8LCdmPsCn69bfJ-6rBA/s1600/prayer.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 209px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibmlXs0tz5RebElpZCOu9xh071kMcH-cxuYXZx1gXTHKrJ5YeTVQuL71i5VkN8ps4sNrI5JAMKV3HBUlBU6Ny4AF2HCz3mIFrwpl02iRFBppQWA2P21yR8LCdmPsCn69bfJ-6rBA/s320/prayer.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5689017205197928610" /></a><br /><br /><strong>Taking it up a gear....children and prayer</strong><br />This is one of my passions. And it's not hard at all to see this change for the better. Read on....<br /><br />Sadly, I’ve watched adults have extremely low expectations of children in this area. I know God is gracious to us and often moves situations and circumstances despite us but I feel compelled to encourage the youngest ones under my care to think big and talk to God about anything or anyone, anytime and anywhere. He’s the one who can do immeasurably more than we ask or imagine (Eph 3:20), so I read from these verses that we can come to God expectantly as he is longing to hear our requests. I recently asked several church leaders how children knew that God answered prayer. “Because he does”, they replied. I asked them how children would know that he does, as I wanted to drive the point home that unless children are hearing the stories of answered prayer, then they are perhaps justified by thinking of Christianity as dull and irrelevant to their fast-moving, social-media dominated world. Children need to see concrete answers to their questions. “Just because he does” holds no power for them. “Prove to me that he does” would be their response. <br /><br />The research for the “You Lost Me” project provides the evidence: one fifth (20%) of the young adults who attended church as a teenager said: “God seems missing from my experience of church” . Oh dear Lord, how have we come so far from what you intended the community of faith to be? <br /><br />This is where parents can exercise tremendous influence. I've written before about one of the significant findings from <a href="http://www.barna.org">Barna's </a>2002 research. Less than one in ten US Christian families prayed or read the Bible together in a typical week. <br /><br />When I first read these statistics (in 2007) my response was to find out if it was representative of the children and families I worked with and for. So I began to ask. I’d say that for around two hundred children aged between 5 and 11, in the two large churches I have worked in, I witnessed a similar trend. Grace might be said at meals, Bible stories were occasionally or regularly read, but talking of the things God had done in individual lives, praying together and giving thanks for answered prayer was definitely not the norm. I began to think: “why is this?”<br /><br />Because of the busy-ness of daily lives, including children’s extra-curricular activities, whole families sitting down to a meal together is less common, although it is still highly valued in the families I worked with. This is the time where my own family do a lot of our talking together, about God and the things he has been doing in our lives and the answers to prayer that we have seen. When are the times that this can happen otherwise? Bedtime is another good time for this. But I’ve observed that children are going to bed much later than even twelve years ago when my daughter was a baby. Some children get themselves off to bed with no adult intervention and some go with a harassed parent who doesn’t have time for extended Bible or prayer time. The ever-present gadgets and visual stimuli in our homes are undoubtedly stealing away time from families to talk and pray together. Long working hours for one or other parent and the pressure to maintain an active, balanced life means less time is given over to simply “being” as a family, at home together. Over-busy parents tend to box their time into neat segments, which can remove spontaneous opportunities for worshipful chat (as we call it!)<br /><br />This picture of increasingly separate, partitioned off blocks of time is alien to families in many cultures who live, work and play together in challenging circumstances in less developed parts of our world. We need to be intentional about carving out precious family time if we are to ground our children in whole-life discipleship that helps us to identify and pray for the ones God is leading us to; the persons of peace introduced at the start of this chapter. I am convinced the pressures and busy-ness of life is one of the enemy’s chief strategies to prevent a movement again towards household re-orientation in significant numbers. I’ve witnessed children (not teenagers!) with five or six extra-curricular commitments after school and on weekends and working parents and lots of homework. Ring-fencing time for family prayer and individual devotions is not impossible, but is certainly under pressure.<br /><br />Many parents have confessed to me that they struggle with praying with their children. They have got stuck in a pattern, which quite frankly is boring them (and their child?) Their child doesn’t seem to want to pray with them and both parties just want to get it over with as quickly as possible.<br /><br />I've briefly outlined some ways to re-awaken your church’s/family’s or children’s prayer life. I hope you can see too that what I write below is for the whole family who may come brand new to the Christian faith. This is not all about children……..many adults get stuck in their own prayer life. This is a brief excerpt from the book I am writing.<br /><br /><strong>Reawakening and Refreshing Prayer in Children and Families</strong><br /><br /><em><strong>(a) Moving children on in prayer. </strong></em>Steps 1 to 5 are suggestions by John and Chris Leach . Step 6 is my own suggestion.<br /><br />Step 1 – leader/parent does everything – chooses a prayer subject, prays about it and says “amen” at the end. Subjects need to be simple and relevant, linked to the every day life or the Bible story you may have just read. The leader/parent models short jargon-free prayers. Eventually the children join in with “amen”.<br /><br />Step 2 – the children repeat prayers phrase by phrase with their leader/parent.<br /><br />Step 3 – the children are asked to suggest items for prayer, then back to step 2.<br /><br />Step 4 – children suggest items for prayer and the leader/parent suggests how they might pray. This could be a set formula like “dear Lord, please look after ________ this week. Amen.”<br /><br />Step 5 – Children think of an issue and pray out loud.<br /><br />Step 6 – (my suggestion/practice) – children lay hands on one another and pray simple prayers for you or one another, are able to deliver words and pictures, and ask God to intervene in situations. Their boldness grows the more they practise this. This step requires you to have taught your children how to tune in to listen to God.<br /><br />Step 6 is ideally practised in a variety of settings such as in Sunday gatherings, in midweek intergenerational house groups, in Missional Communities or in public place on outreach.<br />Use descriptive praise towards the children to mark the movement from one stage to another. Consider using a prayer journal to record answers to prayer. Faith is built when we see the answers come and we celebrate each little success, which builds more faith and higher levels of expectation and so on it goes.<br /><br /><strong>(b) 24/7 Prayer Rooms</strong><br />When my (former) church entered wholeheartedly into regular 24-hour seasons of prayer, seven days a week, (in a specially set apart room in the church building), I wanted to encourage whole families to come and visit it. I wrote to parents before the prayer room week began, enclosing an information leaflet on ways to engage children in the 24/7 prayer room. <br /><br />The prayer room had a chalkboard wall where people could leave verses and drawings, and pegs and hanging space, post-it notes, paper and pens. It was warmly furnished with cushions and chairs, rugs and blankets. I left a specially marked “children’s resource box” with sponges, paints, rollers, sugar paper and crayons as well as a selection of age-appropriate Bibles. This was a great success and used by many families who might not have gone all together to pray. Children, some very young, listened to God, prayed for the church and the nation and received prophetic words and pictures which were displayed on the “community wall”. Immediately they felt part and played an enormous part in the church’s prayer life. I fed back these examples (taking digital photographs, for example) in whole church services and some of the children themselves shared their own story of how they found the prayer room to be a place where they met with God. <br /><br />I have to say that the family stories have been one of the things that has touched me the most and that I have been genuinely privileged to watch unfold. And this is not a difficult one, for readers to imagine happening in your place! Inspiring stories and lots of help on how to start a prayer room is available online (link at the end of this post). <br /><br />This played a part, I believe, in catapulting our church children forward in their expectation of and journey with prayer.<br /><br /><strong>(c) Church prayer meetings</strong><br />It was a short step for me to arrange for some time in our regular church prayer meetings to be given over to all ages coming together to worship and pray, to tune in to God and to pray for the church, the city and the nation. We also enjoyed gentle but powerful times of children praying for – really ministering the power of the Holy Spirit – to adults and adults praying for children. On one occasion I had put together a “tabernacling space” and a young boy who very rarely came to church was lying down in God’s presence. Watching my senior pastor gently pray for him, and minister something from God himself to this young boy’s hurting spirit was like watching a little bit of heaven unfold before me. I’ll never forget what I aw happening in the spirit. Imagine making time for such encounters in God’s presence between adults and children in your faith community.<br /><br />Why not make your church prayer meetings accessible to all ages for the first hour? Make sure it’s not dry and boring. Try to use a gifted worship leader/prayer leader who can engage all ages together. It’s not an easy thing to do, and we have to start our prayer meetings earlier and be there longer ourselves after the children and families have gone home, but it is a cost I gladly pay. Imagine the new families who are to come into the kingdom joining in with these kinds of activities! They will grow in faith and in experiences. Don’t worry if you are not sure how the event will turn out. The one thing I have learned most over the years through making mistakes is that God honours the heart behind what we do and it feels to me as if he is particularly inclined towards our attempts to see children grow in experience of him and in prayer.<br /><br /><strong>(d) Children praying for others</strong><br />I want to stress that the journey I have outlined above from traditional Sunday school -> 24/7 prayer room -> church prayer meetings -> ministering to one another and praying for schools and families, for the sick and the hurting, happened very quickly (in 12 to 18 months) and therefore I believe is eminently possible for any church that takes seriously the call to nurture and disciple the young to take great strides forward. I simply facilitated and then stepped back.<br /><br />I began to see a change by disseminating everything I knew and practiced about children’s innate spirituality to parents and the wider church by any means possible (annual Vision days, one to one meetings, all age services, “family slots”, emails, pastoral home visits, written reports). I wanted to raise the expectation levels by explaining and demonstrating that children connect with God easily and believe for big things. I then planned to take children on from wherever they were in prayer using the 6 steps. All along, I encouraged children to believe God for big things but to listen carefully as to how they should pray because we have an ALMIGHTY powerful God who is longing to move in response to our prayers. Therefore in the first year I spent quite a lot of time teaching my volunteer team and the children themselves to listen out for God and not to plough in praying their best intentions.<br /><br />I also took a group of children who were hungry, very hungry to know God more and worked through the <em>Power of the Praying Kid</em> book. This was no ordinary discipleship group, in that every third week we met and in-between times I wrote a parent history-maker sheet summarizing what we had done and setting some homework (!) for the parent and child to do together, for example: “tell your child about a time you had to forgive someone. Was this easy or hard? What happened once you had done that? What did it feel like?”<br /><br />So children practiced the laying on of hands, waiting on God to listen first for Bible verses or pictures before praying for adults who were ill or facing difficulties (visas, accommodation, final exams). This was a weekly occurrence. I didn’t lead this from the front, I introduced the activity and let the children gather round individuals and pray. Sometimes my team and I wanted to finish off the praying time (!) so we could move on to other programmed activity but there would be very few children sitting on the floor waiting, they had all crowded round the person or persons being prayed for, to lay hands on and to watch, listen and join in. I learned to just go with this. There is a rising hunger amongst children in the UK to pray. <br /><br />I would reiterate that it’s very important to share the answers to prayer so that children match up the beginning with the end and know that God always answers prayer. This also allows them to see that sometimes the answer is “no” or “wait”. It also allows them to grow in bold faith. One week a nurse who was signed off work with a slipped disc came in to the children’s venue to seek prayer specifically because she had heard that the children offered to pray for people. A big crowd of about thirty children dutifully laid hands on her and prayed with faith for her back – very simply, but boldly. She had an appointment that week with the occupational health specialist who had signed her off work. She was healed of all pain and he substantiated that the disc was back in place and that she could return to work. I asked her to come back to tell the children exactly what had happened in the previous seven days. Naturally their faith was strengthened and they had experienced God’s power working through them, which I reckon they will never forget.<br /><br />The journey from a traditional classroom based Sunday School to what I have described above (in two years) continues as children have now prayed in school for their friends to be healed of headaches and stomach upsets. <strong>Friends, this journey is not an impossibly hard one.</strong> God is committed to this where you feel weak because (I am convinced) he loves to hear children praying.<br /><br />The journey in and with prayer for children is an essential one, I believe, for us to be ready for what is to come. People who come new to the Christian faith, with no relatives who have gone before them to help show them the way, will need to be in direct and continual dialogue with their Father in heaven. They’ll need – and I believe will receive - bold and radical answers to prayer that will see a reorientation throughout their extended family towards God and lifelong commitments to the Christian faith. Let’s do all we can to prepare ourselves for a move of prayer that renews and refreshes the whole church that no one age or stage of life is isolated from.<br /><br />Notes:<br /><em>You Lost Me</em> - by David Kinnaman: a must-read<br /><em>And For Your Children</em> - by John and Chris Leach<br /><em>The Power of the Praying Kid</em> - by Stormie Omartian<br />24/7 prayer rooms - see http://uk.24-7prayer.com/prayer-rooms/ <br />You will be inspired and moved – read about all ages taking part in! Prayer rooms are held in schools, churches, homes, community centres - you can set up a prayer room anywhere.lynnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13386263352332136809noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20106217.post-66967969026939197212011-12-13T18:03:00.008+00:002011-12-13T18:39:33.695+00:00Whole Family Outreach and Discipleship<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQLdH-mWpki9IZAKjhg-lNwYY-zM-OTQ3kN6Kmk8cFmhKN5RQxSInNMmDQnHs2fxZKnV6PpBAUR_GkEuJwLPcgYOpTF7LCjx9O-gNp55PIchWAQsKffA9HVl43iPL4xSaZsngjgg/s1600/Fof3.bmp"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQLdH-mWpki9IZAKjhg-lNwYY-zM-OTQ3kN6Kmk8cFmhKN5RQxSInNMmDQnHs2fxZKnV6PpBAUR_GkEuJwLPcgYOpTF7LCjx9O-gNp55PIchWAQsKffA9HVl43iPL4xSaZsngjgg/s400/Fof3.bmp" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5685678766037515250" /></a><br /><br /><br />Why is whole family outreach and discipleship important? Out of many possible reasons, let me suggest five.<br /><br /><strong>1. For too long we have seen children in isolation. </strong><br />We have recognised the fact that children are the most unreached people group in the world , but they are incredibly easy to spot because they are found everywhere. Most of our Evangelical churches usually engage in strategies to reach children with sincere and pure motives to tell them the good news of Jesus. Christians are involved in outreaches to children on the streets, in schools, using a huge variety of methods. Yet what about the parents and grandparents….? What about reaching the whole family, the extended household? The wonderful news is that great strides are being made in this area. Something is changing. For many years Bill Wilson’s Sidewalk Sunday School pioneered in this area by visiting each child and their familiy at home every week, providing practical support wherever possible to the whole family. In the UK, the Kidz Klubs around the country follow the same groundbreaking model.<br /><br />Opportunities to engage with parents outside or church doors are increasing. There is a fresh awakening of a desire in parents to understand more about how their children are wired. And to be the best parent they can. I have also observed (and this has to be a purely anecdotal comment) a rising desire in churches to reach out to and support families. More and more children’s pastors or children and family workers are being appointed to work alongside the army of youth workers and youth pastors. This can be a double-edged sword. Having a paid worker can allow for fresh initiatives to happen in abundance, but I would caution that we need less of a “programme” approach and more of an Old and New Testament approach to families. The church leadership team, and particularly those who teach and preach, still need to direct and guide the congregation on how to include, nurture and disciple the young.<br /><br /><strong>2. In the UK/Europe/USA we face a desperate state of affairs.</strong> <br />God is stirring something up – are we standing at the cusp of another great reformation?<br /><br />We cannot remain complacent by simply assuming that the children we have already will remain in the church. In both the USA and the UK all the evidence is that this isn’t happening. In the year 2000 the church-going population of Great Britain was 4.4 million and 19% of this figure were children aged 15 or under, i.e. 836,000 children. By 2025 the churchgoing population is estimated to be 2.3 million with 5% aged 15 or under i.e. 115,000 . That’s a huge decrease in 15 years or so, if current projections continue. We will have lost 721,000 children in a 25 year period that we are almost halfway through.<br />If we were to go back to 1990’s figures and compare this with the 2025 estimate, we will have lost contact with 1.1 million children. <br /> “we (the UK) are one generation away from extinction” - has been said by many voices. We need to let these words sink in without frightening each other into a picture of gloom. There IS hope – and to quote the UK researcher Peter Brierley :<br /><blockquote>“Strategic action needs to be taken in the next ten years if this position is not to occur. It is no good waking up in 2030 and not liking what one sees; the opportunity to change that future picture has to be taken by 2015”.</blockquote><br />I said there was hope. Something is stirring and a reformation is happening that you as readers have the opportunity to be part of. Professor Rebecca Nye has said :-<br /><blockquote>“Since the reformation, many emergent movements come from lone, marginal voices. Are we in the middle of a new movement or voice?”</blockquote><br />There has been a child theology movement for a number of decades now but I believe I have seen a rise in its influence over more recent years. I have watched the advent of movements like “Will You Make a Difference?” producing thought-provoking resources for people to use in their local congregations. The 4-14 window organisation is another movement started in 2009. The Barna Organisation has been researching the religious influences upon children, youth and families for many years now.<br /><br />Negativity and decline is NOT the picture across the whole world. There are lessons to learn from churches in nations who are experiencing tremendous growth due to what I would summarise as this: children contribute to and partake in kingdom practices – they are being discipled as naturally as drawing breath through the input of the whole church which means they <em>learn to pray with expectant faith, worship chasing the presence of God and engage naturally in mission which is marked by signs and wonders. </em><br /><br /><strong>3. Discipling children and families is biblical</strong>. I finished a few months of research on this in September. Get the book when its finished ;-)<br /><br /><strong>4. Discipling children and their families is one of the areas we need to pour our time and attention into because it’s been ignored</strong>. <br /><br />When I studied for my theology degree, I had to audit the theological content of a range of resources in a category of my choosing. I chose to focus on published material that discipled children. Here’s what I found: <br />Most devotional/educational resources in the UK/USA concentrated on:<br />- telling children <em>about </em>the gospel (VBS, holiday clubs, midweek clubs, Scripture Union group material) <br />- getting them <em>into </em>the Bible (Bible reading notes, Bibles in age-specific formats, Bible quiz books)<br />- telling children <em>narrative stories </em>about past of present-day heroes of the faith in paperback form or fictional stories about children and their families<br />- there are some specific Christian resources written for children dealing with specific pastoral situations such as divorce, bereavement and loss.<br /><br />You will quickly see that this list focuses on the <em><strong>impartation of information </strong></em>– head knowledge. Thankfully this is beginning to change but I would argue not fast enough and, actually, a curriculum or book <strong>of itself </strong>is not going to bring about a sea-change.<br /><br />There are relatively few resources possibly because Christians aren’t always in agreement with the status of children before God. And because it’s not seen as an important area to write about. (Consider how many books on church leadership there are!) <br /><br /><strong>5. Discipling children and their families results in natural mission</strong> - you'll need to ask me about my experiences in this in person or buy the book in 6 months time!<br /><br />It looks pretty certain that we are going to move city to step into the next phase of this in our own lives and I just can't wait. The time of preparation has felt quite long but it feels like its been a car revving up and I am so grateful to those leaders around me who have cheered me on and held my arms up when I've got tired. <br /><br />You've let me - and wanted me - to be around you, but most of all you really have loved me and guided me these past 8 months and you have believed in what I'm doing. You don't think I was crazy to leave my last post as you recognised a "God At Work" roadsign. At the start of this "sabbatical time" I needed folks to get where I was coming from and what the motivation of my heart was. I'm a broken vessel, I am so aware of that, and I won't ever forget what it has felt like to be a recipient of such honour, love and acceptance. <br /><br />The ditches are being dug and all, <strong>ALL,</strong> glory to God for whatever fruit comes out of this time.lynnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13386263352332136809noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20106217.post-55614929955792030242011-12-07T00:40:00.003+00:002011-12-07T00:44:17.835+00:00Top of the Pops<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgd-Fl1ahZHVozaFN0ZkEuOLVoksmTzS1vIMUb3jsSPG9OgWcxMdjlc2fXrK25f5Mtie1qsiEU74C2ojFn7D0P3UAcHYaH09YiK9EQZ4LJzCLhBZJYOy9C2wC7mnMIoWy5CkhDEFw/s1600/jimmy-saville.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgd-Fl1ahZHVozaFN0ZkEuOLVoksmTzS1vIMUb3jsSPG9OgWcxMdjlc2fXrK25f5Mtie1qsiEU74C2ojFn7D0P3UAcHYaH09YiK9EQZ4LJzCLhBZJYOy9C2wC7mnMIoWy5CkhDEFw/s320/jimmy-saville.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5683180585900390530" /></a><br />Now then, now then!<br /><br />Who'da thought it!?!?<br /><br />I'm rising up the charts with no advertising agent, no press releases, no book on the Wesley Owen shelves yet....nothing I do has changed and yet I seem to have hit the heady heights of no 69 on the Wikio female blogger chart, even getting my own wee coloured line on <a href="http://revdlesley.net/2011/12/06/wikio-top-christian-female-bloggers-for-november/">Revd Lesley's graph</a>.<br /><br />Stand by for another post tomorrow, Thursday.<br /><br />:-)lynnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13386263352332136809noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20106217.post-73030197807749070552011-11-22T22:44:00.004+00:002011-11-22T23:04:41.657+00:00Thoughts?<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFRihwPVLzS9gQpcKJaGNgjBz1PiBFCYfMYg2UPL-qb-7_ALtO5xsphQ2b4MT9ntMa9wP3iBcdyGygcayfFR2TMui3ThsjX4RrIyXLw0vf94lmEjA8kvbm8f8XbT0bdkcjfeqVxQ/s1600/abandonment-autistic.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 300px; height: 213px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFRihwPVLzS9gQpcKJaGNgjBz1PiBFCYfMYg2UPL-qb-7_ALtO5xsphQ2b4MT9ntMa9wP3iBcdyGygcayfFR2TMui3ThsjX4RrIyXLw0vf94lmEjA8kvbm8f8XbT0bdkcjfeqVxQ/s320/abandonment-autistic.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5677959482894716914" /></a><br /><strong>8 Reasons Why Single Men Should Work in the Church Nursery<br />by: Pastor Mark Driscoll on Nov 22, 2011 in Discipleship, Marriage, Parenting </strong> <em><br /><br />I think my love for kids started with my grandpa George. He died in 1980 when I was ten years old. I still think of him often. He loved me, and I loved him. He was a retired diesel mechanic and a big guy who wore overalls and taught me how to handle power tools as I worked with him in his garage.<br /><br />Riding in his car was always great because he kept in his glove box a bag of Tootsie Roll Pops with their fudgetastic center. When we went out to breakfast, the waitresses always dropped by our table to hear him tell a story—and he was hilarious. And when I stayed the night at his house, we’d sneak up while Grandma was asleep to eat caramel apples and watch wrestling on TV—“Rowdy” Roddy Piper, The Sheik, Andre the Giant, and my favorite, Jimmy “Superfly” Snuka.<br /><br />The kids in my grandpa’s neighborhood loved him too. They often dropped by to see what he was working on in his shop. And when the ice cream truck drove by, they would stop, get whatever they wanted, and he would always come out and pay for it all.<br /><br />I loved my grandpa. And I miss him.<br /><br />One thing he left with me was a deep love for children. I just picked it up from him, as did his daughter, my mom. Growing up at the oldest of five children, I looked forward to one day being a dad.<br /><br />As a new Christian and college freshman, my first ministry was taking care of a bunch of young kids during a daytime women’s Bible study. It was the best. The kids were super fun, and on any given week I had anywhere from maybe 10 to 20 kids under the age of five for a few hours without any help. Those hours included crackers, juice, Bible stories, wrestling for the boys, and tea parties for the girls. The moms were surprised that a 19-year-old single guy would volunteer for the nursery, but I’m glad I did. And I’d encourage the same for other single men. In fact, I have nine reasons why single men should work in the church nursery:<br /><br />It helps you learn what Jesus meant by child-like faith<br />When you tell a kid that Jesus walked on water, they don’t defer to Hume and enlightenment presuppositions about the miraculous. They say, “Yeah!” and their eyes get big because they believe what the Bible says.<br /><br />It helps you learn about God as Father<br />When you interact with kids, you are reminded that to God you are just a kid and that you really need your Father. Every guy, including the one in a suit making more money than he can ever spend, is just a Fudgsicle-faced kid to the Father.<br /><br />It opens up your heart to children<br />This causes you to view such things as sex and women differently, less selfishly, and more biblically.<br /><br />It helps you pick a wife who will be a good mom <br />When you hang out with kids, you realize you need to marry a woman who is more interested in building a good legacy than just having a good time.<br /><br />It helps you learn how to be a good father<br />Some guys are afraid, repelled, or ignorant of kids. Get over your fears and prejudices by hanging out with someone else’s kids a few hours a week, and learn how to interact with kids well.<br /><br />It’s important for kids without a dad to have godly, male investment in their life<br />Young boys without a dad need the godly investment of a man. Young girls without a dad need a godly man’s loving encouragement. And the single moms really appreciate godly men investing in their kids.<br /><br />It’s a good place to meet a nice gal<br />Single guys may not know this, but nice, single gals who love Jesus and want to marry and become a mom someday are working in the nursery. That’s like fishing in a trout pond if you’re a single guy. And the single moms dropping off their kids should be considered for marriage too. After all, Jesus’ mother was a single mom until Joseph married her and adopted Jesus.<br /><br />Jesus did<br />Our God came to earth as a single guy and hung out with kids. They loved him. They didn’t crucify him like the religious folks. If you want to learn about Jesus and become more like him, spend more time with kids like he did.</em><br /><strong><br />What do you think of this, dear readers? Will post some thoughts in a day or two.....</strong>lynnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13386263352332136809noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20106217.post-9467332695544103602011-11-15T11:14:00.006+00:002011-11-15T11:57:28.029+00:00Children - the Natural Missional Conduit<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnoANtAR3N40_3cVUk7opbjFQdKfwHZer5QuzVrvIbE020vkbQmpRJWZ47NNr3ATqUEOjOXteuXYsUESQeQ11v6XHx0uC7dQJPWgwic7BcUUwvtYEKL-_syK3wewvkUnoILBWn1w/s1600/creche2.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnoANtAR3N40_3cVUk7opbjFQdKfwHZer5QuzVrvIbE020vkbQmpRJWZ47NNr3ATqUEOjOXteuXYsUESQeQ11v6XHx0uC7dQJPWgwic7BcUUwvtYEKL-_syK3wewvkUnoILBWn1w/s320/creche2.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5675182456179338818" /></a><br />How does your church see children and mission? I don't mean, what mission do you do for children, although that's a really important question.....<br /><br />I mean:<br />- what is their involvement in your church's missional activity?<br />- how do you encourage their involvement? I reckon you have no problem with wanting teenagers to be missional, what about those younger than 13? And actually, wouldn't missional teenagers have even more practice if they were <strong>discipled into </strong>missional ways of thinking before they were 13?<br />- if you are a <strong>parent</strong>, how are you instilling in your own child(ren) the need not just to TELL others, but to live your life in such a way that it can't fail to point people to Jesus To simply love and serve!<br />- if you are a <strong>church leader</strong> - in the pressure on you to be missional/have strategies/run evangelistic activities, I've said it before and I'll say it again - don't miss the ones in front of you, lower down, maybe even at your knee level!<br />- and where you have children who are stepping out into deeper levels of prayer and ministry, with a heart for those outside of the church, are you putting your best around them in terms of community, involvement and belonging? Are they being pastored and cared for? Just marvelling at their giftedness/openness/spirituality and giving them opportunities to exercise that is not going to be enough. I don't want to descend into dualistic-type talk but be aware that they need you - the church - to love them, pray for them and cover their backs.<br /><br /><strong>Children: a natural missional conduit</strong><br /><br />Children talk about God very naturally. Because they trust, they easily talk about what they know and have seen and heard. This is not just simple mimicry, it is a God-ordained way of transmitting truth. I have no scientific proof for this – this is only a throwaway personal proposition - but I wonder if this ability is linked to the hardwiring in the brain to connect with God identified by neuroscientists, which I've written about elsewhere? To connect with God, to experience him and to simply tell others the truth about him? Let me give you an example: a three year old child is brought to church by a carer. Her grandmother, who is the child’s full time guardian, is at home. The fact that her grandchild attends Sunday School gives her a break, some respite for a few hours. As the weeks and months pass, her little grandchild tells her repeatedly that Jesus loves her, that Jesus forgives us for the things she's done wrong, that she can tell Jesus the things that are worrying her and he will listen. I believe this child was speaking right into the things her grandmother most needed to hear at those moments.<br /><br />Some months later, I have the awesome privilege of sitting with this grandmother in her home as she shares some of the stresses in her life. She tells me what her grandchild has said and asks if this could be true, does Jesus really feel this way about her? She confesses how deeply impacted she was by this little child’s words to her. I am able to tell her that it is true and to pray with her. To help her let go of some of the guilt she is carrying and to receive God’s love for herself – all because of the insistent words of her three year old grandaughter. <br /><br />A similar story but not so positive in its outcome. At our annual summer holiday club for children, a brother and sister returned home singing the songs they had learned about Jesus love, care and protection for some months after the club has finished. They explained to their parents what the songs meant to them. The children were not allowed back to the holiday club the following summer as their parents did not want the same thing to happen again as they were not comfortable with their children having this experience. Dear readers – all over our world children are speaking and singing the most incredible truth about the nature of God himself! They do it innocently, naturally, sometimes like lambs to the slaughter. They need our love and support – and care and protection. Being such natural conduits means children are also susceptible to attack. <br /><br />In 2005 I had a vivid dream. I watched as hundreds of terracotta warriors were unearthed, just like those uncovered in 1974 in China. But these weren’t adults, they were individual children, each armed with weaponry and precisely positioned in battle formation for the task that was ahead. I didn’t know this at the time of the dream, but each terracotta soldier that was uncovered from the Emperor’s Palace in Xi’an, Shaanxi Province, was absolutely unique. No two soldiers of the eight thousand discovered are the same. <br /><br />At the time of this dream I felt the call of God to love, support and equip children to stand strong in their faith. As a response to this picture in 2005 I wrote a vision statement which said to the church that we would disciple children to be victors, not victims. I knew from God that I could have high expectations, not for the children in my church to perform, but high expectations as to their capabilities to be disciples. I knew that I would not be alone in wanting to disciple children, that there would be many people in churches in the comfortable West feeling the same thing. And so my “career” in children and family ministry has tried to be very practical in carrying out that vision.<br /><br />So firstly, I was to help children grow up knowing who they were in Christ, but secondly as a result of this dream, I knew I was to help prepare the church to be the safe place, the covering for these little warriors. I'm writing the book asking all who read it to partner in this. These children aren’t disciples-in-training, they are by definition disciples who are experiencing the battle now. <br /><br />When she was six years old my daughter came home from school in tears because a boy in her class had laughed at her because she believed in Jesus. “He’s not real, he’s dead!” she was told. This was devastating for my daughter so what followed in our household was a crash course in apologetics suitable for six-year-olds to use in the classroom and playground. <br /><br />Let every member of the church of Jesus aid in this task of teaching, instructing, welcoming and loving children who carry a huge ability to impart to the church but also a keen eye to watch and protect them, intercede for them by name and cover them at all times. They are not designed to operate as lone rangers but alongside others in their family, part of the clan and tribe of the people of God.<br /><br />I love this.lynnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13386263352332136809noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20106217.post-48466814670376043492011-10-22T23:31:00.009+01:002011-10-29T12:04:19.702+01:00Update<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4y99S2deWoM1DT-N9_pEhUbN89dfbVsk5snL8ysQXClGFWgKxEEaURLDozjEx8XOCR_UGCDeNUKW0JQ5gN-INMSlSm0lLPc33Wh0IoHDZ9sN5Q2sgfjSu5N5v4LI9-V3Iw4gJpQ/s1600/autumn.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 299px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4y99S2deWoM1DT-N9_pEhUbN89dfbVsk5snL8ysQXClGFWgKxEEaURLDozjEx8XOCR_UGCDeNUKW0JQ5gN-INMSlSm0lLPc33Wh0IoHDZ9sN5Q2sgfjSu5N5v4LI9-V3Iw4gJpQ/s400/autumn.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5666449077374787122" /></a><br /><br />As is our habit, we are just back from an autumnal week in the Highlands....special time in the shadow of Cairngorm, watching the snow tipping the mountain-tops, falling on our faces as we cycled down from Glenmore Lodge to Aviemore on Tuesday. Lovely family time.<br /><br />It's been a month since I blogged. There are lots of reasons for this. The first rule of blogging is to be careful what you share and your reasons for doing so! I'm not ready to share yet some of the amazing things that have been happening that UTTERLY demonstrate the incredible hand of God as shown to me <a href="http://helpiworkwithchildren.blogspot.com/2011_05_01_archive.html">here</a><br /><br />Also I have been working quite hard on the book, on a chapter on societal transformation through households in the first century. I had to submit a huge chunk of writing which has now allowed for the release of a contract. <br /><br />The evening I held on transforming society on 26 Sept went really well. About 60 people came (including 3 from Aberdeen!) from about 12 churches and six denominations (yaaass! I love this) and we took some time to worship and pray for one another. <br /><br />I've enjoyed some special weekends speaking at some other churches, all through the friendships and networks that I already have and that have existed for many years. These myriad of people really know me and I know such support for my time out to read, write and reflect. I spend a lot of time these days feeling so grateful to God. He's my deepest, closest friend. He has blessed us with not one, not two, but three free holidays. He's supplied every penny I earned from m last post for five months now. Even though we tried to do something in our own wisdom (ha!), going to an estate agent to begin the process, he said "don't sell your house yet" in July. WHEN WE LISTEN, he's speaking tender words of love, affirmation, direction, restoration and promise. I'm walking into LIFE instead of labouring under expectation and stress and struggle, some of my own making. <br /><br />Oh my, I have been sandpapered all over and confessed sin I didn't know I had or think I had. I bless, bless, bless all that God is doing in my past church. <br /><br />I am seeing some things with fresh eyes and I am so excited for what is ahead for the UK. People, get ready!<br /><br />In my local area I have an opportunity to do something I love on Monday - a missional party! Yay, parties can be missional and they are meant to be missional! What do I mean by this? Take the wedding where Jesus turned water into wine - this miracle pointed to the Father and to the kingdom of heaven invading our time and space - that's what I plan to make space for on Monday!<br /><br />Party food - healthy options too! - games and music, dooking for apples, fancy dress then exalting Jesus in a very simple way accessible to Christian and not-yet Christian, to explain his role in taking away fear this Hallowe'en night. Dovetailing this with explaining how he can be called on when we're home alone or nowhere near a church (building). Take home reminders of this. Making opportunities available to do a parenting course. <br /><br />You found me Jesus. With all that I am, I want people to find you in the same way.<br />And do you know what, I want to be able to take whatever risk is needed to make it happen.<a href="http://helpiworkwithchildren.blogspot.com/2011/09/reaching-families.html#comments"></a>lynnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13386263352332136809noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20106217.post-59167993663400093722011-09-27T22:57:00.009+01:002011-09-27T23:32:35.871+01:00Reaching Families<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWFT94Qza_Z4c-Ir7CN34ZWL2E04UKip6A-a9ufMVdfiHsW_MUNNPQUI0_EnoRQWaHrmQM7DWHMtQvdnUQaozTggedS_tJHpFD3BpUzWUsxrWNNJ3PWtZpIZurivsLLc5wiwMS1Q/s1600/familypic.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWFT94Qza_Z4c-Ir7CN34ZWL2E04UKip6A-a9ufMVdfiHsW_MUNNPQUI0_EnoRQWaHrmQM7DWHMtQvdnUQaozTggedS_tJHpFD3BpUzWUsxrWNNJ3PWtZpIZurivsLLc5wiwMS1Q/s320/familypic.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5657164875696032066" /></a><br />I have been carrying a growing inquisitiveness to find out about the conditions that led to the phenomenal growth of the church in the First Century. <br />I love this quote from Rodney Stark, a secular historian who has tried to answer this very same question:<br /><em>How did a tiny and obscure messianic movement from the edge of the Roman Empire dislodge classical paganism and become the dominant faith of Western civilisation?</em> <br /><br />Reading a theology book (Family in the Bible) for the second time in preparation for remitting an academic review of it, I kept coming across footnotes about this Stark book. I hadn't come across it before so last month I read it from cover to cover. Its compulsive reading for anyone interested in the growth of the church and/or with a social science background, as I do (Geography). Stark outlines a conservative estimate of 40 per cent growth per decade in the numbers of Christians and admits that he comes to this figure without any space for signs, wonders and the miraculous. There seems to have been a remarkable increase in figures between 250 and 300 and this is borne out in archaeological evidence of houses being remodelled to fit more worshippers in. It’s interesting to note at this period that persecution had increased under several Roman Emperors most notably Valerian in 253 but by 311 this lessened, culminating in Constantine’s edict of toleration in 313. So from this there may be a lesson for us today: as persecution increased the church grew rapidly, then the governmental leaders realised that they needed the Christians onside (in 311, Galerius realised he needed the Christians to pray for the security of the state).<br /><br />Most interestingly of all is the evidence for growth well in excess of 40pc per decade that has come to light in Egypt – extraordinary and miraculous growth is shown in the numbers of Christian converts in Egypt (from 0pc Christian in Egypt to 18 pc, in 65 years) – people changed their names to Christian names and this was tracked on papyri.<br /><br />So 40 pc per decade in the growth of Christianity is called a conservative, given that very few actual records exist. The reality was that vast numbers must have been added at some stages AND the reality was that this thing spread geographically. Imagine what that would look like for your church. But more than that, for your region/area. These numbers were for society as a whole. Sure we have growing churches today, but for every growing one, how many are declining or shutting? This was true societal transformation.<br /><br /><strong>What factors contributed to this?</strong>Sociological study on the growth of the Moonies (stay with me!!) – a cult – all of the converts in the study were united by close ties of friendship or kinship e.g. next door neighbours, mothers of similar ages, friends from work.<br /><br />And so here lies a <strong>key principle</strong> in reaching families: for conversion to happen, people have or develop stronger attachments to Christians than they have to non-members of Christianity. There is a very interesting sociological principle here on conformity, which is outlined in the book. Suffice to say: strong friendships with Christian group members results in conversions. Simple.<br /><br />And here we get to the crux of it for us – households. Each member of a household unit has unparalleled opportunities to attract other people into the faith that they hold dear through each of their networks. Note I said networks, not just one's own family. There is no single term for family in the NT.<br /><br />Oikos, meaning house or household, included the householders family, slaves, and through their network of relationships, friends and neighbours. This was the major network in Rome and when Christianity grew using the same pattern of relating oikos – the exponential growth happened. Those looking in saw tremendous change and reorientation.<br /><br />So what about talking about ministry to <em>households </em>if the word "family" has negative or painful connotations for people? We have more one or two person households in this country than at any point in history. We have broken ourselves down into smaller and smaller units, therefore I wonder if there is a rise in people looking for "oikos" - community through their networks. And you know what, churches don't just need the keen beans in their 20s pre-children with more time on their hands, churches need business people, teenagers, retired people, parents of young children, empty-nesters, kids.... - for this to really be all it could be means it needs every one. As Banning Liebscher said: <em><strong>don't think revival if going to come through the young. If you have breath in your body, God wants to use you.</strong></em><br /><br />Household transformation in the first few centuries - I wonder if I can describe how radical the shift was. <br /><br />In first century Graeco-Roman times, the man held power over everyone’s possessions in the whole household – he was the <em>paterfamilias</em>. You may not be surprised to know that the Roman Empire had demographic challenges. There was a low birthrate due to abortion and infanticide which was readily practised. Fathers had the right to speak life or death over every newborn child and male children were favoured. There were far more men than women due to the practice of killing newborn females. Children had no status, childhood was seen as something to be grown out of, to just get through into adulthood and full legal status (under Roman law).<br /><br />Christianity directly impacted the quality of life for wives and mothers. Is it any wonder that women turned to Christianity in vast numbers? Christian teaching directly confronted :<br />Infidelity <br />Incest<br />Polygamy <br />Infanticide<br />Divorce <br />Abortion<br /><br />We cannot underestimate the sociological change this brought about. There was an increase in women’s status, standing and security. In the first few centuries there are numerous examples of noble Roman women bringing their husbands to faith. Christian women enjoyed far greater marital security and equality than pagan women – this was attractive to others to see. This drew people to the church. <br /><br />People often say to me: there was so much about children in the Gospels, what happened in Acts? Acts sees the power of the Holy Spirit poured out which propels the church forward; Jesus words elevating children were the necessary platform for the move of God throughout households in Acts. <a href="http://helpiworkwithchildren.blogspot.com/2010/09/children-and-family-in-book-of-acts.html">I wrote a little more about this here</a>, please do read in conjunction with this post if you have time. <br /><br />So to see a return to household transformation requires:<br /><br />1.a return to releasing each other to be <strong>“fully present”</strong> in our networks of friends, families and neighbours instead of always out at meetings. Or <em>maybe even</em> (shock horror) cutting our work hours.... Stop being so bloomin' busy!<br /><br />2.<strong>A deliberate strategy to build attractive models of oikos </strong>in our local churches – and may I suggest that at least some of these ways encompass all of the generations........I had an amazing journey with this between 2006 and 2008.<br /><br /><br />More in the next post.<br /><br />Acknowledgement: Rodney Stark, The Rise of Christianity: How the Obscure, Marginal Jesus Movement Became the nt Religious Force in the Western World in a Few Centuries (Princeton University Press/Harper Collins, 1996/1997).lynnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13386263352332136809noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20106217.post-89030392242930891272011-09-12T23:52:00.006+01:002011-09-13T00:49:44.680+01:00Upcoming EventIf you are in the Central Belt, (or even further north!), maybe you might like to gather with me and others across denominations as we seek God for his empowering, his strategy and his presence as we prepare our churches for welcoming more and more children and their whole families into the Christian faith.<br /><br />If you know me or have been following this blog for some time, you will know that I cannot separate children and teenagers from their families. I have been reading and researching the first four centuries of church growth as preparation for the chapter on children and families in the New Testament in the book I am writing.<br /><br />I have re-discovered much that is making my heart beat faster, my faith levels increase and an increasing, "awakes me at night" deep hunger for the good news to spill out into the community. Like an infectious disease, (!) my plan was simply to facilitate a time for others to catch it too by drawing folks together to worship and pray. I'll teach a little bit on what I see in the Bible that underpins and highlights the rapid transferral of a life-changing belief in the person of Jesus from one person to another through the extended family and social networks of the day - sociologists like Rodney Stark have concrete evidence for a 40% growth rate every decade from the time of Jesus resurrection to the end of the fourth century. Close study of actual death records in Egypt over one time period showed this growth rate to be modest - it was in fact far higher than this for the one specific area records existed for. <br /><br />The reasons for this rapid spread of Christianity are varied and complex but there is consensus that the different way of life (witness) of the changing family had such an impact that people WANTED to re-orientate their lives towards Jesus - babies were born without the fear of exposure/infanticide, women were treated well and grew in their own giftings and leadership; marriage was honoured, slaves were treated well, families grew and thrived. In short - people were attracted to what they saw in the lives of Christians. Wow.Wow. Wow.....oh Father, how we want to see more of that in our time!<br /><br />So this evening of prayer, worship, teaching and preparation to go and love and serve is on <strong>Monday 26 September at 7.30pm</strong>. Email me on children.pastor@gmail.com if you would like more information.<br /><br />At the moment I am serving on the ministry team of an <a href="http://catchthefire.com/college/leaders-schools/1-week-leaders-school-(ilsom)">ILSOM</a> (International Leaders School of Ministry) and have been reminded by the internationally-travelled speakers of the incredible growth of the church in South America, Africa, China, Indonesia, Korea....in short - in every continent bar ours and North America......<br /><br />But something is stirring. Hunger is rising. A month ago, 15,000 young adults gathered for a conference in Chicago - Jesus Culture Awakening. I was privileged to watch a lot of the talks live and I urge you to listen to them - they blew me away.. You can find out about them <a href="http://www.jesusculture.com/awakening/">here </a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHpND4NUaPi26DSemBqLgoA-pZUp9N08N447tlUpI29ZzZpxeke2PFOnpatqO7sYk8Vj7IDA5521_X_QiDxRb3e4Mzub7zJec7Shh754G96-hnCscHVkBdwYNSIzk4gaoHXzMy4A/s1600/jesus+culture+chicago.png"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 214px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHpND4NUaPi26DSemBqLgoA-pZUp9N08N447tlUpI29ZzZpxeke2PFOnpatqO7sYk8Vj7IDA5521_X_QiDxRb3e4Mzub7zJec7Shh754G96-hnCscHVkBdwYNSIzk4gaoHXzMy4A/s320/jesus+culture+chicago.png" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5651615082232848866" /></a><br /><br />I do believe that hunger is stirring in our nation too - to get "out there", to love and serve local communities, to love our cities, towns and villages. There is a rising dissatisfaction I have observed with just "doing church". Yet we mustn't rush ahead without spending time with the Father to just rest and listen; to hear his strategies and plans, just receiving from him because we're simply his beloved! Its hard enough to get out there without crashing and burning(interestingly I <a href="http://mikebreen.wordpress.com/2011/09/12/why-the-missional-movement-will-fail/">read this today</a> and I wholeheartedly agree with Mike Breen's (initially tough-sounding) post.<br /><br />And so the plan for Monday 26 Sept is that we too will gather to ask the Lord to enlarge our hearts to love the ones who are in front of us, maybe even related to us (!) and to believe that once more God can change a nation by impacting one who impacts another who then impacts another. We need the fuel and fire that comes from sitting at the Father's feet and drinking in the Holy Spirit's power and plans rather than relying on our own strategies and thoughts.lynnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13386263352332136809noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20106217.post-27671366839373011402011-09-06T23:36:00.005+01:002011-09-07T00:27:38.522+01:00Dealing with challenging behaviour<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxbIVQEsXWIxjG3w3xyR4twGzMwmZE_8UZKns_E3OomjOHFPjy5VI-yQaQE00sKI20gjrc5r6hq9eXTou4vYONVaf34jW2_30SywnNMW86pUx8EH-_15p8C9uhlypafBq8NPNdCA/s1600/fighting+children.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 226px; height: 170px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxbIVQEsXWIxjG3w3xyR4twGzMwmZE_8UZKns_E3OomjOHFPjy5VI-yQaQE00sKI20gjrc5r6hq9eXTou4vYONVaf34jW2_30SywnNMW86pUx8EH-_15p8C9uhlypafBq8NPNdCA/s400/fighting+children.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5649387678591612626" /></a><br /><br />I'm often asked how to handle difficult behaviour.<br />I think everything in the notes below sums it up!<br /><br /><br /><strong>Some causes of challenging behaviour</strong> <br /><br />(for the first part of this posting, I'd like to reference SU's Top Tips series on handling difficult behaviour, although I have added some other factors in due to my own knowledge, practice and experience)<br /><br />• general learning difficulties<br /><br />• specific learning difficulties (do you have completed registration and consent forms? Do volunteers know about the relevant information?)<br /><br />• developmental disorders – ADHD, autism, dyslexia, dyspraxia<br /><br />• low self-image (vicious circle)<br /><br />• fragmented home situations and unsettled relationships with parents<br /><br />• lack of boundaries in the home<br /><br />• physical demands – what I call the Saturday night sleepover sydrome...!<br /><br />• group dynamics - who's the strong leader amongst the children, for example<br /><br />• the organisation of your session - it might be our fault!<br /><br />• (teenagers?) alcohol/drug use<br /><br /><br /><strong>Types of behaviour</strong><br /><br />• childish irresponsibility<br /><br />• behaviour linked to age and stage of development<br /><br />• challenge to authority<br /><br />Hebrews 12:6<br /> "My son, do not make light of the Lord's discipline, and do not lose heart when he rebukes you, because the Lord disciplines those he loves, and he punishes everyone he accepts as a son.”<br /><br />Don't be afraid of discipline!!<br /><br /><br /><strong>Some thoughts:</strong><br />Children and teenagers, like adults, are made in the image of God, imageo dei, so like us they matter to him. Have a God-focused approach towards them.<br /><br />• Children are so valuable to God that He commands us to protect them (1Sam 20:42, Ezra 8:21)<br /><br />• God wants to have a genuine relationship with His children – He describes how children may enter His presence and enjoy His company (Ps 8:2, 34:11, 103:13, Mal 2:15, Matt 21:15, Mark 10:13-16)<br /><br />• God loves young people enough to ensure they receive discipline. It is a reflection of His passion for a child’s well being.<br /><br />• God enjoys the nature and personality of children – attributes such as sincerity, humility, naïveté, vulnerability and simplicity. He treasures these characteristics.<br /><br /><br /><strong>Towards Change…….</strong><br /><br /><strong>1.Working within the church community and communicate clearly</strong><br />Be aware of Child Protection policy and any written guidelines your church has and use a large dollop of common sense. I had written a discipline policy that was disseminated once a year to volunteers so that they knew what was minor behavioural issues and what was major (everyone has different standards and expectations therefore a team of volunteers need help to establish the base level - is interrupting a leader who is talking ok? Some leaders say it's fine, others cannot tolerate it. If this example is a major issue for your team, decide what you will accept, and disseminate this information amongst the team, preferably in writing and LET CHILDREN KNOW! Setting boundaries publicly to the children and showing that you work as a team yields such fruit. Appy your decisions simply and consistently and soon it won't be an issue any more. I can testify over and over again how well this works).<br /><br /><strong>2.Working with parents/guardians</strong><br />Parents/guardians are our first port of call. How can you consult with them? You may need to invest a little time in speaking with them. Always speak with the relevant leader as s/he may have relevant information to give you. Find out about parents’ expectations of their child’s/teenager’s behaviour as you may find the root of the problem right there!<br /><br /><strong>3.Working with other children/youth team members</strong><br />Everything written so far needs to be applied to a team context – we need to work together. Children and teenagers spot tensions and differences between adults and will play us off one another. This underlines the need for written policies/clear communication. It's the one strong similarity between church and school. I was gathering up to 175 and 160 children together in two churches; the size of a small primary school! If your church has 10-30 children, the scale may be different but the need is still there.<br /><br /><strong>4. Prepare thoroughly and vary the style</strong><br />I've spent many years working with and watching children, and now I observe a growing tendency in some (many?) leaders to just turn up to help at a kids club or Sunday school, assuming that all the preparation has been done by the main leader of that day. That may be very well if they are pouring juice or doing toilet runs but if they are answering questions about God and teaching something from the Bible it's just not enough. The best way to address this is to raise it as a training issue - and then monitor.<br /><br />I instigated a "send-out-by-Friday" email and planning grid of who was doing what, with the Bible passage, relevant small group questions and heart prep to be done in advance of the Sunday session in both of the churches I have worked in. A good rule of thumb is that we should personally spend at least twice the amount of time on the passage that the children will spend thinking about and interacting with the Bible. This word is living and active - therefore we who teach it (whether it be to adults OR children) must spend time on and with it. Don't give out stale bread! Tastes awful....<br /><br />Vary the style - this is worth a whole other posting....<br /><br />Suffice to say we often teach people in the style that WE prefer, so if we like reading and thinking, we take children into a lot of reading the Bible out loud and group discussion. But leading group discussions with children requires highly skilled individuals, so the best way round this is to watch the time allocation for this part of the programme and make sure there are opportunities for the kinaesthetic (doing) - making something, acting something out, trying out a new skill.<br /><br />Children engage in low level misbehaviour most often when they are bored and unstimulated. Allow them to EXPERIENCE God's presence, his working and moving amongst the group, the answered prayers, his holiness when a song finishes and you stand in silence, his tender care in moments of quiet soaking in his presence.<br /><br />Just some thoughts from the past decades!lynnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13386263352332136809noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20106217.post-65061648604431098012011-08-16T22:07:00.008+01:002011-08-17T22:08:36.635+01:00Restoration<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVi8P7ftYuvKExLPEXwRGOmRpoegtqNQ0qasuZW9rxbUwVAi4tsDdF72iWMagJsAa2QxibEQcxyV01vJ062dj5bqHXvd11JIiJYs3g0hIl1fFl4-fJAQNfSOdleyBp56f_wSiZnQ/s1600/restoration.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 266px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVi8P7ftYuvKExLPEXwRGOmRpoegtqNQ0qasuZW9rxbUwVAi4tsDdF72iWMagJsAa2QxibEQcxyV01vJ062dj5bqHXvd11JIiJYs3g0hIl1fFl4-fJAQNfSOdleyBp56f_wSiZnQ/s400/restoration.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5641921055409053554" /></a>
<br /><strong>Restored - a brief word study</strong>
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<br />- the cupbearer to his position
<br />- Moses' hand
<br />- various cities and towns
<br />- a king's hand
<br />- Naaman's flesh
<br />- a son restored to life
<br />- the boundaries of Israel
<br />- the altar of the Lord
<br />- Jerusalem
<br />- human beings, if we return to the Lord.
<br />- everything Job lost
<br />- God's kingdom
<br />- Nebuchadnezzar's sanity
<br />- the temple
<br />- the priesthood
<br />- people's sight
<br />- strength restored to those who feel weak
<br />- individuals restored, brought back safely, to the family of believers
<br />- Eden
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<br />I love the word restoration. When I looked at google images to help me see some tangible examples of restoration, in nearly every case, restoration resulted in something better than it was before. I'm excited about that.
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<br />"sabbaticalling", writing, has given me time away, time out, time with no pressure, time to come under the maker's care and attention. I think this has resulted in a time of refining, loving more, loving better at home (and I hope out of the home!), receiving love and feeling love, time to listen, time to watch carefully, time to reflect and time to redefine what's important.
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<br />Time too for us as a family to continue to feel that we will give ourselves utterly to loving the next generation well, to teaching, training and modelling missional living to children - little children, older children, teenagers and, in particular with Mr HIWWC, troubled teenagers. We love the generations, what was invested in us from those older than us in the past will bever be forgotten and we honour those who made themselves vulnerable, let us in, let us learn, let us fail, picked us up...with my whole heart I pray that we will be able to do the same, that those younger than us will go deeper, farther and higher than we ever did or could.
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<br />Restored. An amazing word!lynnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13386263352332136809noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20106217.post-35985307788809973952011-08-03T20:42:00.005+01:002012-05-12T23:41:16.654+01:00Disappointed<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhmlr0A5m71vZ5z1PVFM6VaQOel-Dexp9QeMCiKKgm6YFcYNm-jNo9rDmIZCMAnpdpvYQkVDqsoonnWm5WbmU24bHjyVHZ-7Ds1pS-Lsz2fI8YEt6AHAyqII56gs4099PSvYAoS6w/s1600/Naughty-girl_420-420x0.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 213px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhmlr0A5m71vZ5z1PVFM6VaQOel-Dexp9QeMCiKKgm6YFcYNm-jNo9rDmIZCMAnpdpvYQkVDqsoonnWm5WbmU24bHjyVHZ-7Ds1pS-Lsz2fI8YEt6AHAyqII56gs4099PSvYAoS6w/s320/Naughty-girl_420-420x0.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5636727183642072514" /></a><br />
<strong>"Discipline:<br />
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We try to make our programs fun, fresh and powerful so that a child will not become disruptive. We also use positive reinforcement and team competitions where points are awarded for good behaviour and deducted for innapropriate behaviour. In extreme circumstances a child may be placed back into the adult service with their parent. Parents will be notified of innapropriate behaviour (sic)."</strong><br />
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Grrrrrrrrrrr. The above is an excerpt from a very large church website. One of the key members of this church, who founded the children's ministry programme in that place is speaking at an event in the UK. I'm afraid reading words like those above really put me off going. In fact, I don't really want to go (unless you, dear reader, talk me round!) because entirely separate churching of age groups to me isn't just a matter of taste, its about losing something of the discipleship culture we are meant to build and celebrate and show the world. <br />
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I'm disappointed and I'm tired of reading words like those above: "<em>a child may be placed back in the ADULT service with their parent. Parents will be notified of inappropriate behaviour</em>" (I've corrected the spelling).<br />
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Why am I so disappointed?<br />
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<strong>1. "adult service"</strong> - like the cinema classification system, are we soon to have: <br />
<strong>"U cert"</strong> - everyone can attend this event, such as a church beach trip<br />
<strong>"PG"</strong> - you can bring your offspring to this meeting, but if they barf or get freaked out by anything that happens, it's your responsibility.<br />
<strong>"12"</strong> - your older primary children can probably handle this event, but you'd better be on hand, parents (e.g. Good Friday reflective service)<br />
<strong>"15"</strong> - only for those in the yoof programme e.g. average length evening service<br />
<strong>"18"</strong> - you'd better be grown up to have some longevity about you e.g. very long evening service, church business meetings, many church prayer meetings<br />
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2. I'm disappointed that the most extreme method of discipline is to put a child BACK in the adult service with the adults. Note the words: <strong>BACK IN</strong>. <br />
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So the message given out by this website is that <em>the adults meeting with God equals a place of punishment for a child who is missing the excitement of the kids programme.</em> <br />
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What does this say about the experience of being in the presence of God? I actually feel very strongly about this point in case you hadn't guessed. I have devised in the past a whole load of ways of working with children who are having behaviour issues at church; it nearly always comes out of one of two things: (a) we need to look at <strong>what </strong>we are teaching, <strong>how </strong>we are teaching it and <strong>who </strong>is teaching it and maybe make some changes or (b)things are not great at home in some way; a lack of boundaries, or there are worries, tensions, bullying, threats or abuse. I've been used to sitting with my colleagues and sharing pastorally so that I might be the lead person but we pray and support the family (and me) together, for we cared about each family represented in the church.<br />
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3. I'm also (as the regulars amongst you will know) disappointed with the term "adult service". I don't believe there is biblical precedent for it. <br />
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I favour the "part and part" approach with occasional but regular all-age incursions that we may all learn from each other and in one or other, or both the churches I have worked in, I have been liberated to do my thing, e.g. to model good pastoral care for families, kids and volunteers, to pioneer prayer meetings for all ages, large celebration meetings with everyone represented and intergenerational cell groups AS AN OPTION for those who wish to use them. Neither church has held adult-only everything (except of course the certificate 18 church business meetings!)<br />
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4. And finally, as if there wasn't enough here for you all to leave this blog and never return, I'm disappointed that this website makes no mention of the need to WORK WITH and SUPPORT parents. If a child isn't behaving, <em>something </em>is going on, as I said in point 2 above, I believe pastoral care and support is so important. They may just be tired or family circumstances might be causing a wobble (a parent out of work, for example) but it can be something more serious. Many years ago I worked with a boy who the team had to refer on to me for continual misbehaviour - it transpired that there was major stuff going on. As a church we offered support in a number of ways to the family and it was with great delight some years later I saw him be baptised. On a return visit to the church he hugged me and Mr HIWWC. Imagine if we had just sent him back into the "adult service"....(for his behaviour was extreme). <br />
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To be clear, I can and have sent for parents to come out of the service to support the team in serious cases but at the end I talk with the parent(s) and the child, pray with them, visit them at home if necessary and follow up. I <em>always </em>talk about how we have a God of second chances and how my love and care for them does not depend on their behaviour.<br />
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Rant over.......anyone with me at all?lynnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13386263352332136809noreply@blogger.com8