
Following up slightly from the last post (in a Tommy Tangent way, but all will become clear), I thought I'd write a quick post about my ministry non-negotiables.
Have a think about what yours are. Doesn't mean you have to be ordained/staff - in whatever you serve in, what are your non-negotiables?
The background to the post was that I was helping someone prepare for an interview and I asked: what are your non-negotiables? What do you hold dear? This is a very insightful question as the the things the person answers for their own ministry/service will probably be the things they consider high value for themselves i.e. they will look for a church/leaders that demonstrate the same things.
So here's my top 3:
1. LOVE: I want to overflow with love for kids and families. If you know me then you might know that I truly love the local church; it's an amazing place, I just love it; what it is capable of. It breaks my heart then when it isn't like that. I grieve deeply for my imperfections as a member of the body. I frequently teach on how there is nowhere else quite like the local church; where all generations come together. I was deeply loved and mentored as a teenager by the older generations and this has had a lasting impact on my worldview.
I have found the capacity to love and love well increase over the past years, I can only assume that's because the closer we get to God,
the more he wants to overflow our hearts with love.
Whatever else I don't manage to do; wherever I have let people down, I am confident that they would say "
she loved". I am less concerned with activity and programme and events (the rush to gain approval and make folks think we are effective by the amount of programmed events happening) and more concerned that I love well. With youngsters it is ALL about relationship - they (and their parents!) can "sniff out" an absence of genuine love and care towards them. Conversely, they show great love and loyalty when they feel loved, listened to and thought of. Young people and their families must be represented
at the highest level of church decision-making. I'm not stepping into the firing line any further than this - see the short section on "Advice to Senior Pastors" in George Barna's book "Transforming Your Children Into Spiritual Champions"! But pray for senior leaders - so much is pressing upon them for their time and attention. It ain't easy.....
Quite embarrassingly, one of the children's ministry team in the church we are visiting just now apologised on my first day for her (perceived) lack of preparation as my children joined the group for their morning activities. I reassured her by saying that all I was concerned about was that she
loved on the children. Love covers a multitude of wrongs! It never gives up. It looks for the good instead of failure.
In my earlier years, Mr HIWWC and I were leaders then a discipling couple involved to the youth group in church. At the same time I was a teacher in secondary school. One of the things I tried to practice in both roles was to add value to every young person when I interacted with them. I tried to notice the good, praise sincerely and love unconditionally, not taking their strops personally (!)
When such a desire prevails, even the angriest youngster can be transformed by a kind word that builds up his/her self-esteem. Love brings
trust. In 2002, I remember taking my newborn son into see a class of Third years where the girls had been difficult to teach and dislayed pretty nasty attitudes to me and to each other. I remember giving my tiny baby to a girl I shall call N to hold. She cradled him, I think she felt so honoured that I trusted her to hold him. But I did. I wanted her
to know I trusted her. When I returned to work after maternity leave, her attitude to me had completely changed. She listened attentively, worked hard and was a pleaure to teach. All because I honoured her and trusted her. As a teacher, I really loved my pupils with the love God had placed in my hearts.
I've lost the rag with my own kids of course, really badly. I'm not perfect. But I'm work-in-progress under grace when I confessed that I have blown it.
2. THE MANIFEST PRESENCE OF GODWhat does this mean? Why is this a non-negotiable to mE? Put simply - I need it. I covet it, I want it, I don't want God's presence to leave me. I want to experience it, i.e. feel it in my emotions as well as by faith in my head! Three years ago I posted about
this passage in Exodus , so apologies to blog followers with good memories for bringing it up again, but now this OT foreshadow of God's self-revealing is complete - the presence of God brought home to our hearts by Jesus, our great high priest. And because I love him and because he wants to pour out his love into our hearts, I expect that to happen when I take time out to worship or gather corporately to worship. And it's NOT JUST ABOUT SINGING SONGS!! - although bring me the prophetic minstrels who so often precede God speaking - check out 2 Kings 3:15.
This desire for God's presence is the link to yesterday's post, sometimes it's as simple as in the intake of a breath that you are deeply aware of God's presence. SO this is also
a THEOLOGICAL non-negotiable to me for I teach children and young people (and when I gather teams together) about the whole dynamic of praise, worship, adoration, reverence and intimacy because if folks don't get this when they're young then they're going to struggle later on. Frightening Barna findings on this - found in the book "Real Teens" - 69% of 13 year olds who profess to be Christians have never experienced a sense of God's presence.
3. HUMILITYFinally, I am attracted to the school of "
I can't, but he can". I suppose this is particularly acute in my life because God drew someone (me) who worked with teenagers and adults within church and outside church and asked them to work with children, teenagers and adults. Over the past eight years he has refined my skills there, taken me down the road of theological qualification and placed me in two great churches that taught me loads. He did a Jehovah Sneaky on me mid-2003 and popped in the heart for children. Why? Because many folks do adult ministry and lots do youth ministry, but who has a heart for them all together? i.e. stops seeing partitions? I freely admit I wouldn't have chosen the path I've been on if I wasn't woo-ed, drawn and desperate to be obedient.
There are
many, many things that this role could entail that I simply can't do - so that's where I believe in building team. And I am very drawn to facedown encounters with God when new strategies are in the off-ing, not relying just on discussions based on strength and competency. This is the way Paul describes it in 1 Corinthians:
Brothers and sisters, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. God chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things—and the things that are not—to nullify the things that are, so that no one may boast before him.
So this is a non-negotiable for me that I imprint on the mind of the teams that I supervised -
yes, prepare teaching inputs well,
yes, pre-plan and organise your ministry
yes, have the highest standards of safeguarding - but come in humility, asking him to work through you.
This (short) post needs to stop here: so have a go in the comments - what are YOUR non negotiables for your church/your job/your family?