2006 Report on the Global Spread of Aids by the World Health Organisation.
I couldn't help myself - I spent an hour on the floor having a loud outburst to God. I was crying, sobbing uncontrollably and feeling anger, confusion. I was full of questions that aren't going away. I think I have managed to bury or put these questions aside before, but I can't seem to tonight.
Why do MILLIONS of children have to die of Aids? Why do I feel the pain of this? Why children? It's not their fault - they are innocents. Why such a slow, agonising death, for some of them? Why do so many of them have to die alone without a mum and a dad to hold them, because they have already passed away?
What does it mean to be an Esther, for such a time as this?
Hey
ReplyDeleteI think that the question is - what does it mean to be a Lynn at a time such as this...and you are being.
To feel the pain, to refuse to be silent through the expression of tears (tears are the heart trying to speak), and to, wherever and in whatever way you can through entering this pain bring help and healing...that is what I think it means to be a Lynn at a time such as this.
Peace
Lynn,
ReplyDeleteThanks for this - for sharing what you are going through. I've been there (i.e. sobbing in a heap on the floor) several times & strange as it seems it is a good place to be. The bad place to be is turning your back on all the suffering.
I prayed about 4 years ago for God to break my heart with the things that break his heart - He did, and He is still doing it in His way & His time. I needed a fresh envisioning, or a bit of a push to keep going & you have really helped me discover that. I need God's help to "spend myself on behalf of the oppressed" I need your help to remember that that's what I'm here for!
thanks,
Vicki