Tonight has been one of the best nights out since I arrived in this new city.
Started off at a Worship Central event and ended up in my favourite pub (so far in my 8 week adventure in this new place) with mountains of friends all around, in the kind of wee booths where you could chat to people (a sure sign I am getting old)
The event itself was great. Tim Hughes and Al Gordon are not only sensitive and skilled musicians and worship leaders, but they also have an ability to teach right into the heart of issues that affect worship leaders and worshippers. They teach into a specialised area as guys who are living it.
Lots of my friends from my last church came for drinks with quite a few from my new church and it was great for me to see people chatting. It felt quite emotional for me; knowing that two teams of people were there; one with whom I had shared life for years and years; who knew me; who know my heart; who would do anything to help me; who I love so, so dearly and still acutely miss .....
......and also the new friends; with whom I am shyly falling in love with; into community with; where as each day passes the insecurity of "how do I fit?" "am I supposed to be here, really?", "what can I bring?"; "why on earth did they want me to come here?" is lessening each day as I am loved into life here for who I am. They've seen me in tears; they've seen me frustrated to the eyeballs (16 rotas!?!?!?!?); they've seen me miserably homesick and incredibly alone in the midst of a busy church; they have seen me as a moany cow too.
Where do I belong? Here.
Should I go back to my old church? No. Door's closed, shop's shut.
Will I ever forget the children, teams, families, clubs in my old church? Never.
I learned so much, grew so much, received SO MUCH and now it's time to sow it elsewhere.
Lord Jesus, I commit myself afresh to this task to serve my new family.
Thanks for what I saw tonight.