I am OK and I will continue to be OK. I'm not a quitter. I read some "inspirational words" (this IS a bad sign!!) on a website that said: "fall down seven times, get up eight", which, coupled with an examination of the life of Paul in preparation for NT exegesis and exams, has REALLY convicted me of what the Bible says about tough times and knowing God to be sovereign, in control AND Father.
Moving to a new kind of place in a different kind of ministry team + missing friends + not knowing people well + criticism/knocks fairly regularly = one feeling sad children's pastor.
But the maths-like equation doesn't end there - around it, through it, above it and beyond it is one so faithful, so loving, so full of mercy and grace that I find myself melting into his arms like a child when I really allow him to put HIS perspective on the situation and to love me. I'm loving Colossians chapter 1, verses 15-20.
Someone here wrote some tough words to us a while ago - saying that we weren't co-erced to move here so, basically, get on with it. Hard words but true. If I'm going to lead people and deliver hard words occasionally, I've got to be able to receive them; take them on the chin and learn from Paul who said:
I have worked much harder, been in prison more frequently, been flogged more severely, and been exposed to death again and again. Five times I received from the Jews the forty lashes minus one. Three times I was beaten with rods, once I was stoned, three times I was shipwrecked, I spent a night and a day in the open sea, I have been constantly on the move. I have been in danger from rivers, in danger from bandits, in danger from my own countrymen, in danger from Gentiles; in danger in the city, in danger in the country, in danger at sea; and in danger from false brothers. I have labored and toiled and have often gone without sleep; I have known hunger and thirst and have often gone without food; I have been cold and naked.
Cheesey but true saying: when the outlook sucks, try the UPLOOK. I'm looking and learning as child, I hope!